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WWE Survivor Series Recap

* Daniel Bryan {C} vs. Ted DiBiase (WWE United States Title Match)

DiBiase comes to the ring first, accompanied by Maryse. I never noticed it before now but DiBiase's solo entrance music sounds a lot like T-Pain. That's still not as cool as Bryan's Ride of the Valkyries music. We have to listen to (fucking) Michael Cole call him a NERD for the one-thousandth time. He's joined on commentary by Matt Striker and Jerry 'The King' Lawler, who calls Maryse a golddigger. The bell rings and we're underway. Some fan in the front row has an orange EPIC FAIL sign they're obsessed with showing - I'm going to assume that's for Cole. The lights went dark for a second in the opening minute of the match though - maybe that sign was a SIGN. DiBiase suplexes Bryan all the way out of the ring. He goes out to throw Bryan back in as Maryse looks on with a smug grin, wearing a fur stole jacket.

Top rope elbow by DiBiase to the apron drops Bryan right back down to the floor. He throws Bryan back in again and gets a cover for 2. Bryan managers to stagged DiBiase with a couple of uppercuts, and DiBiase responds by throwing him down for some ground n' pound. For some reason Maryse throws up the "talk to the hand" sign - someone in the front row must have been pissing her off. DiBiase gives Bryan a backbreaker and a dropkick to the face for a two count. Cole: "Daniel Bryan had a career in WWE handed to him!" I hate arguing with this douchebag, but Bryan had a 10 year career before he ever got to the E. If anybody got HANDED a career, that was Michael Cole, who was handed one by J.R. when he left. Bryan dropkicks DiBiase into the corner hard for a near fall, backflips over him in the corner, and hits a clothesline to knock DiBiase down. DiBiase hits a kick to the face, Bryan tosses DiBiase out, and hits a suicide dive to the floor!

Bryan successfully wipes DiBiase out, but he crashes shoulder first into the barricade, and begins selling it immediately. Bryan throws DiBiase back in and hits a top rope missile dropkick for two, selling the right shoulder again when he gets up. At some point I'm really going to get sick of that fucking EPIC FAIL sign. Put it down kid, we've all seen it. Bryan counters into a small package for 2. Clothesline by DiBiase for 2. WWE gives us a replay as DiBiase psychs up to hit Bryan with his finisher. He pulls Bryan up for Dream Street but Bryan kicks off the ropes and rolls through to a near fall. Bryan finally throws DiBiase off but gets hit with a spinebuster for 2. DiBiase hits more closed fists on the ground and the ref yells I ALREADY WARNED YOU ONCE. (Believability - he haz it.) Bryan crotches DiBiase when he climbs the ropes, then goes up for a fall away superplex that connects! He sells the shoulder again as he covers for 2. Bryan tries to transition from that to the LeBell Lock but DiBiase counters and catapults him into the corner for a near fall. Bryan recovers from that and manages to grab the head for the Lock! TED DIBIASE TAPS OUT - DANIEL BRYAN RETAINS THE US TITLE. Cole: "Somehow he keeps winning - I don't get it!" Somehow YOU have a job as an announcer - I GET THAT EVEN LESS.

MIZ KILLS BRYAN WITH THE MITB BRIEFCASE. He and his stooge Alex Riley make their way to the ring. Miz immediately demands someone hand him a mic. "Sorry to interrupt because we all know how much I respect Daniel Bryan but I have something to say!" The lights go down again and then come back up. "I am a proud citizen of Cleveland, Ohio! And it's fitting that I'm here in Miami, because the Heat are a lot like the Nexus - arrogant, despised by millions, overrated, and they both are hopelessly mediocre! I think LeBron is like the Wade Barrett of the NBA - not that he's a leader - because we all know he's Dwayne Wade's little sidekick. No he's like Barrett because they both think they're entitled to a championship. The difference is Wade Barrett might become one tonight, whereas LeBron NEVER will. He has a commercial where he asks what he should do. What should you do? You should go back to Cleveland and apologize to each and every one of us YOU TRAITOR." The crowd chants LET'S GO HEAT. "And as for you Barrett, I don't care what happens to Cena. All you and Orton need to know is that I'm tired of carrying this briefcase. So, right now, it's not a matter of IF, it's a simple question of WHEN. Because I'M THE MIZ - and you are all witnesses to the fact that I'm" (the lights go down again then come back up) "I'M AWESOME!!" Thus endeth the interruption of The Miz.

* Sheamus vs. John Morrison (Grudge Match)

Tonight's #fansign entries for Sheamus: "Even in Miami, Sheamus can't get a tan" and "Got milk FELLA?" Morrison comes out after him and still does the slow-mo' hair blow. Will the Shaman of Sexy shellack Sheamus in a show of superiority tonight? We'll find out momentarily. The bell rings to start our match at 8:27 ET. Sheamus hits a hard slap and Morrison responds with hard forearms. Huricanrana and a dropkick send Sheamus out to the floor, and Morrison follows up with a corkscrew over the rope to the floor to wipe him out, where he starts punching Sheamus in the face. Sheamus throws him into the barricade and htis a hammerfist to the skull in the process before throwing him back in for a 2 count. Sheamus continues the beating with power moves, leaving Morrison face down selling as the crowd boos. He follows with a stomp to the head. Striker: "I'm enjoying the beating." No comment on what that says about Striker's psyche. Another near fall. Sheamus works on the left arm as Morrison fights to his feet, ducks a clotheslines, then eats a knee to the gut. Sheamus clubs Morrison in the chest repeatedly until the ref pulls him off then gets another near fall.

Sheamus grins like the match is already over while Morrison rolls to the ropes to pull himself back to his feet. Sheamus and Morrison brawl on the second rope, Sheamus clubs the crap out of him again, hooks the head and tries to jump off for a superplex. Morrison fights him off, throws punches to knock him off, then jumps off for a flying crossbody. Sheamus rolls through it and SLAMS Morrison for a near fall. Sheamus sets up for the BROGUE KICK but Morrison avoids it and hits an enzuguiri! Both men are down as the ref begins to count to ten. They're back up well before it even gets close to a countout. Morrison knocks Sheamus down with a series of clotheslines and a heel kick to the jaw for 2. IRISH CURSE BACKBREAKER for 2 as Morrison kicks out. Sheamus grins again and sets up for the high cross but Morrison counters into a catapult and a Russian leg sweep for 2. Morrison gives Sheamus a little of his medicine with stomps and kicks. Sheamus tries to throw him out, he lands on the ropes, Sheamus chops the left leg to knock him down.

Sheamus goes for the left leg, Morrison tries to counter, so Sheamus pancakes him on his face for a near fall. He screams WHAT? THREE!!! at the ref. Half-Boston crab on the left leg before Morrison gets a rope break. Morrison goes for a roll-up for a near fall and Sheamus attacks the left leg again after he kicks out. Sheamus holds Morrison up by that leg and slaps him in the face but Morrison kicks him off with his free leg and goes to the ropes for STARSHIP PAIN but Sheamus cuts him off before he can hit it. High cross countered, Sheamus eats a flying knee to the face and MORRISON GETS THE PIN - WINNER: JOHN MORRISON. That came out of nowhere but it's good to have a match every now and then that doesn't end with a finisher. Knucklehead commercial follows.

Cena is pacing backstage wearing his purple Never Give Up t-shirt. R-Truth comes in and says he may have a solution to all of this. "Nexus is banned from ringside for the championship match. I'm not. Since the only way to win is by pinfall or submission, what's to stop me from coming down there and something accidentally happens to Randy Orton? You get to keep your job, 1-2-3, and it's guilt free." Cena: "You do that I wake up tomorrow and I can't live with myself! I made a promise to myself on Monday, I'm calling it down the middle, straight up. That's the truth." Killings: "Truth is, I'll believe it when I see it John!"

* Dolph Ziggler {C} vs. Kaval (Intercontinental Title Match)

Vickie Guerrero interrupts after Kaval comes out. "EXCUSE ME! I SAID EXCUSE ME!! Please welcome the best ever Intercontinental Champion, the man who also happens to be my boyfriend, Dolph Ziggler!!!" Cole and Lawler throw shoutouts to the armed forces as Ziggles makes his way to the ring, Vickie applauding him the entire way. Ziggler tries to overpower Kaval in the corner after the bell rings but he hits strikes and gets the first near fall of the match. Ziggler recovers as Cole whines about Kaval being an "internet darling" and plugs NXT. I should write to WWE and demand a $15 discount just for him being one-third of the commentary - he brings this show down with every word he utters. Times like these I miss being at DJ's Dugout because at least there the crowd is loud enough I can't hear half of what he says. Kaval climbs to the second rope to throw punches but Vickie distracts him and Ziggler slips out and drops Kaval jaw first into the top rope.

Ziggler hits a neckbreaker for 2 and Kaval tries to shake it off. Ziggler puts him in a side headlock as the camera keeps zooming in on Vickie's COUGAR necklace. Cole lambasts Striker: "Pretty soon you'll be quoting Dirty Harry out here!" Well fuckface it would beat anything YOU have to say. Kaval with a backflip off the ropes to wipe Ziggler out for a near fall. Kaval pulls Ziggler to his feet and throws a hard chop in the corner then hits a cartwheel kick to the nose for another near fall. Kaval goes top rope while we get a replay but Ziggler recovers and knocks him down. He climbs up to apply a sleeper hold on the second rope, Kaval fights him off with reverse elbows, looks at Ziggler behind him and climbs to the top for a reverse double footstomp. Ziggler gets out of the way but Kaval lands on his feet. ZIG ZAG BY ZIGGLER but KAVAL KICKS OUT.

Vickie is screaming FINISH HIM as (ironically) Striker says the match has come to a SCREECHING halt. Kaval hits an enzuguiri from the top rope and covers for 2.999999. We get a replay as Striker sarcastically asks Cole if he's impressed with Kaval yet. Both men are down and the ref is counting. Kaval gets back up before 5 and comes over to kick Ziggler in the leg. Ziggler hits a kick and a headbutt. Ziggler whips Kaval into the corner, Kaval gets out of the way and tries to pull Ziggler down by the trunks (nearly pantsing him in the process). Small package for 2. Double roll-through and Ziggler grabs a handful of tights for the three count! WINNER AND STILL IC CHAMPION: DOLPH ZIGGLER. Vickie is ecstatic. Ziggler actually DOES seem to have a bloody nose as he backs his way up the ramp. Hail the Villain is thanked for "Runaway" as we're told the Traditional Survivor Series match is next!

Team Del Rio is backstage. Swagger says as the only former champion here the team should be called The All-American Americans and calls Miami "little Cuba." Cody Rhodes says Swagger's just mad because he wasn't let into a club last night due to his shoes. Ziggler: "They were my grandfather's, and they are VINTAGE." Del Rio interrupts with Reks and McIntyre in tow and says that their squabbling is boring, but there's nothing to worry about, and they'll win because he's the one and only Alberto Del Rio. Rhodes: "I hate to admit it, but he's good."

* Traditional Survivor Series Match: Team Mysterio vs. Team Del Rio

Big Show comes out first, followed by Chris Masters and Kofi Kingston. MVP and team captain Rey Mysterio are the last to arrive. Mysterio's inner ear balance issues seem resolved enough for him to jump to the second row and pose for the crowd. 'Dashing' Cody Rhodes comes out first for the heel team. Drew 'No Longer the Chosen One' McIntyre is next. The rasta surfer musclehead douche Tyler Reks is next. RICARDO RODRIGUEZ comes out to introduce ALBERTO DEL RIO. Aren't we short one man? Where is Swagger? They're letting him come out last instead of Del Rio? ADR smiles and gloats as his golden shower of pyro rains down on the stage. Swagger is in the ring so I guess I missed his introduction all together. Either that or they cut it SUPER short so we could get Del Rio's announcer.

Del Rio and Mysterio start the match off for their respective teams. Every time Mysterio tries to attack him he backs away, finally smacking Cody Rhodes in the chest to tag him in. Rhodes takes a side headlock, knocks Rey down with a shoulder tackle, Rey leapfrogs him, leaps over him, then eats a kick to the face. Striker and Cole spend so much time arguing that Lawler says "I'm BEGGING you guys to talk about Survivor Series." Del Rio tags back in and cheapshots him all while mockingly saying "Six one nine huh? Six one nine?" Mysterio hits a drop toe hold into the ropes and a sliding baseball kick to the face before tagging MVP in to get a near fall. Del Rio misses with a kick, MVP gets a near fall, then wrings the left arm before tagging in Kofi to attack it. Chris Masters tags in, and so does Tyler Reks. Drew tags in to continue the beating of Masters. Big clothesline for two as the crowd chants WE WANT BIG SHOW. Masters escapes and tags in MVP. MVP lays out Drew and goes BALLIN' with the elbow. Del Rio tries to interfere and gets knocked off the apron, but gets his revenge by sweeping the legs and holding MVP down so Drew can get the pin. MVP IS ELIMINATED.

Chris Masters is sent in to take his place. Del Rio comes in off a tag, eats a delayed vertical suplex, but then puts masters in the cross armbar. CHRIS MASTERS ELIMINATED. And to the roar of delight from the crowd BIG SHOW STEPS IN. Swagger is tagged in, much to his dismay, and he eats two frying pan chop hands. Swagger recovers though by chopping the leg and tagging Del Rio in. Del Rio smugly walks over and kicks Big Show, who immediately pops back up and begins yelling and Del Rio angrily. Del Rio tags in Drew McIntyre, smiles smugly at Big Show, and gets PUNCHED IN DA FACE. Ringside officials are offering Del Rio smelling salts to revive him. Big Show tags Kofi, then throws him on top of Drew for 2. It appears they're helping a woozy Del Rio to the back. Cody is tagged in. Kofi slaps him in the face and Rhodes starts throwing a Ric Flair FIT. He's so upset about it he goes out of the ring to check his face in the mirror on his jacket, then kicks the ring steps. He comes back in and Kofi hits him in the face AGAIN. Big Show is tagged in and Show holds his face with one palm. Cody covers up to protect his face, so Show chops him in the back, then PUNCHES HIM IN THE FACE for 3. CODY RHODES ELIMINATED.

Reks nearly gets the fall when he runs in right away, then tags out to Swagger to continue the beatdown. Swagger and Reks exchange quick tags to work Big Show over. Big Show seemingly goes for a leg triangle but Swagger gets out of it. Big Show tries to chokeslam him but Swagger rolls through and SINKS IN THE ANKLE LOCK. Show crawls for the corner and manages to tag in Mysterio, who flies into Swagger for a 2.9 near fall. Swagger catches him in the corner, Mysterio escapes, but then eats a big boot for an equally near fall. Swagger gives Kofi a cheapshot on the apron while Mysterio is down. Kofi gives a leg sweep in response to put Swagger on the ropes, but he catches Mysterio when he tries a six-one-nine. Rey spins Swagger around and he hits the ropes but instead of getting the 619 Swagger tags out to Reks, so Mysterio tags out to Kingston. Kingston kicks him in the face and hits a HIGH leapfrog crossbody for 2.9. Reks puts Kofi in a Tree of Woe, Kofi springs out of it with a kick and then pins the stunned Reks 1-2-3. TYLER REKS ELIMINATED.

Swagger runs in and tries to get the ankle lock but Kingston counters into a roll-up for 2. Kofi blocks a Gutwrench Oklahoma Bomb, goes for the Jamaican Buzzsaw, but Swagger catches his leg and TAPS HIM OUT WITH THE ANKLE LOCK - KINGSTON IS GONE. Big Show comes in, tags Mysterio, attempts to throw him on top of Swagger but McIntyre trips him and Mysterio comes down from seven feet high SPLAT. Mysterio recovers, headscissors Swagger into the ropes, hits the 6-1-9 and then a diving headbutt from Big Show's shoulders! JACK SWAGGER ELIMINATED. Drew's Future Shock is blocked, Rey tags out Show before hitting the 6-1-9, and Big Show hits the CHOKESLAM FOR 3. WINNERS: REY MYSTERIO & THE BIG SHOW - THE SOLE SURVIVORS FOR TEAM MYSTERIO. Big Show is all laughs and smiles and goes out to rub people's hands and shake hands with the fans.

We go backstage after a promo for the TLC PPV. Josh Mathews interviews Randy Orton. "I am SICK and tired of talking about John Cena. I feel for the guy and all, I really do but uhh, John Cena did this to himself. So I'm not thinking about John Cena. I'm thinking about Wade Barrett. I'm going to beat him tonight and retain the WWE Title. John knows me well enough to know that being fired is the best situation he can be in, because if he screws me over he knows what I'd do to him. I don't care about Wade Barrett, John Cena or even The Miz. All I care about is walking out of here the WWE Champion. Tonight's not about Cena - Free or Fired. Tonight's about Wade Barrett - punt to the skull, or RKO."

* LayCool {C} vs. Natalya (2-on-1 Handicap Match for WWE Divas Title)

Justin Roberts announces LayCool as the "so-called" co-champions. Lawler reminds us this match is brought to you by Paper Jamz. I'm remding you this is a good time to grab a beer, get some popcorn, take a bathroom break or all of the above. Natalya comes out to the Bret Hart remix music. The match starts at 9:31 ET with Michelle in the ring but Layla tags in shortly after. Layla kicks her all the way through the ropes and chokers her around the neck. Michelle drags her to the floor and drops Natalya right on her neck in such a sloppy manner I think Natalya might have gotten genuinely hurt. LayCool try to double team her when she's thrown back in but Natalya hits a double suplex. She's thrown out of the ring though and McCool beats her up until Lil' Naitch tells her to bring it back in the ring NOW. McCool goes in the ring to break the count, then gets wiped out over the dashers. Layla tries to interfere and eats a kick to the gut for her trouble. Layla ends up wiped out over the barricade too. Natalya drags McCool back over the barricade the hard way but is countered into the dashers before she can throw McCool in. Layla tries to follow her in the ring, Natalya trips her and MCCOOL KNOCKS NOGGINS WITH LAYLA. Natalya immediately applies the sharpshooter and MCCOOL TAPS OUT - NATTIE NEIDHART WINS THE TITLE.

LayCool double team her during the post-match celebrating. McCool holds up the Divas Title as the crowd chants YOU TAPPED OUT. Before she can hit her with the belt BETH PHOENIX RUNS DOWN, BOOBS BOUNCING THE WHOLE WAY. Phoenix immediately hurks Layla up in the air and gives her an IMPLANT BUSTER. Phoenix puts Natalya on her shoulders and they celebrate with BOTH Butterfly Belts. Beth looks more jacked up than ever - swollen biceps AND swollen chest. We get a replay of the title win and the return of the Glamazon to clean house in the ring. Miz Paper Jamz promo follows.

* Kane {C} vs. Edge (World Heavyweight Title Match)

Kane comes out first at 9:43 ET wearing the World Heavyweight Title around the waist. I always like the champions that actually wear their title belts as opposed to carrying them over their shoulder. Justin Roberts introduces the champ after he sets off his pyros in all four corners. Paul Bearer is nowhere to be seen. Lawler wants to know where he is. YOU THINK YOU KNOW ME. Edge's music hits and he comes out to the roar of the crowd. Edge waits for his pyros to go off, then says "oh wait I forgot something" and rolls out an empty wheelchair without Paul Bearer in it to mock Kane. Justin Roberts introduced Edge coming down the ramp so we don't get the big title introductions before the bell rings at 9:46.

Edge slaps Kane in the face to start things off. He tries to come off the ropes, nearly gets caught in a chokeslam, then hits a heel to the jaw for a one count. When Kane starts clubbering Edge, he goes outside to roll the empty wheelchair around the ring. An enraged Kane gives chase and Edge wipes him out in the dashers before throwing him back in. Some fan at ringside holds up his ACOSTA 840 sign for about the 100th time. Congratulations buddy, you've officially been noticed. Edge drags Kane over to a ringpost and snaps his left knee into the steel, even though Kane tried to fight him off. Edge comes back in the ring and drags Kane out of the corner, but Kane recovers and kicks Edge repeatedly. He pulls Edge to his feet and hits an uppercut. Edge responds with a knee to the gut and goes for a suplex but Kane counters and drops Edge across the ropes, then knocks him out to the floor.

Outside the ring Kane pulls Edge back up by the hair, yells WHERE IS MY FATHER in his face, then throws him into the ring to continue the beating. Edge is knocked down by a whip to the corner. Kane yells it again louder this time so the whole arena can hear, not once but twice. He beats Edge up in the ropes as the ref counts to 5. Whip to the opposite corner to knock Edge down again. WHERE IS HE EDGE? WHERE IS PAUL BEARER? Kane hits a boot to the skull to knock Edge down and cover for 2. He asks Mr. Copeland to supply the information once again. This is as much interrogation as wrestling match at the moment. The crowd decides to play along and chant WHERE'S PAUL BEAR-ER. Near fall for Kane. He puts Edge in a headlock and twists on his neck. Edge fights out with punches to the gut and shots to the head. Edge is floated over the ropes, but he runs Kane's head into the turnbuckle and climbs up for a lateral press and near fall.

Kane decides to go to the top rope himself but gets caught in mid-air with a kick that leaves both men down on the mat for the ref to start counting. This seems to be the favorite gimmick of the agents in the back. Perhaps they should try designing ONE match where both guys aren't down for a count of 4 to 6. Edge recovers, trips Kane into the ropes, splashes his back then covers for 2. Kane charges and eats a boot to the jaw, but Edge eats an uppercut to the jaw coming off the ropes for 2.9. Edge avoids a suplex and snaps Kane's neck down for 2.9. VINTAGE SIDE SLAM by Kane for a near fall. Kane goes outside to climb the ropes and Edge cuts him off. Kane throws him off and he lands crotch first on the ropes, then Kane hits a flying clothesline to knock him down and make another near near fall. The Big Red Monster holds up his right hand to signal it's all over but Edge avoids the chokeslam and hits a DDT.

The referee starts to count to ten again but Edge gets up at three and realizes Kane is still down on the opposite side of the ring. SPEAR IS BLOCKED WITH A BOOT TO THE SKULL. Chokeslam? CHOKESLAM! 1-2-NO!!! Edge kicks out. Kane throws a fit and screams at the ref. He slashes his throat to signal it's REALLY over this time, goes for the Tombstone Piledriver, but Edge counters and hits the SPEAR FOR THREE. Wait, both men's shoulders were down. JUSTIN ROBERTS ANNOUNCES EDGE THE CHAMPION BUT THE REFEREE IS WAVING IT OFF. "Both competitors shoulders were down for three, culminating in a tie. As a result of a tie, the title stays with the champion. Therefore still your World Heavyweight Champion - KANE!"

That's not the end of this fight. Both men start brawling on the floor after the match. Edge throws Kane into the wheelchair and starts punching him in the face. Edge gets up a head of steam and runs with the wheelchair and lets Kane go THROUGH THE BARRICADE. The fans want to spear him on the other side of the wall but Edge is satisfied to have left Kane in a heap on the floor and backs up the ramp looking on. We get a replay and we see that after the spear each man hand an arm over the other's body which means both made the pin. Promo for WrestleMania 27 in Atlanta on April 3rd follows.

Backstage Wade Barrett reminds John Cena that this is the very arena where Nexus stunned the crowd by tearing up the ring and giving him the beating of a lifetime. "The only reason I didn't fire you after that stunt you pulled on Raw is that I chose not to. You need to do the right thing tonight and then you'll be free of Nexus forever. If you don't though it will be over for you. Do I make myself clear?" Cena: "I do remember this building. I remember that night. I remember every single thing Nexus has ever done to me. You need to remember this - whatever happens tonight, when the time is right, I know exactly what I'm doing." Camera pans the skyline of Miami outside.

* Nexus - Justin Gabriel & Heath Slater {C} vs. Santino & Kozlov (WWE Tag Title Match)

Most of Nexus sans Wade Barrett accompany the champions to the ring. Santino and Kozlov are accompanied by nothing except Santino's theme music. Lil' Naitch tries to restore order in the ring before holding up the copper penny Roman gladiator belts. The bell rings at 10:08 ET. Santino swings and misses trying to punch Slater. Slater mocks him so Santino gives him an arm drag with the same hand he's pointing with. Gabriel tags in, Santino bows to him, avoids a couple of kicks and tags him down. Kozlov blind tags as Santino hits an arm wringer and throws Slater to the corner. Gabriel tags in and eats a shove to the chest when he tries to leap in the air. Gabriel snaps his neck off the ropes and tags back out. The crowd chants SAN-TI-NO as Slater hits a flying knee for two. The heels are exchanging quick tags now to beat down Kozlov. Santino's protests are only distracting the ref more. Gabriel is in the ring now trying to choke Kozlov out. He makes a cover for 2 and goes right back to attacking the neck. Another SAN-TI-NO chant. Slater cheapshots Santino, he runs in to give chase, and the heels double team while the ref throws him out. Santino begs Kozlov to make a tag. Slater: "SHUT UP!" Santino: "YOU SHUT UP YOU SUMMAGUN OR I BREAK YOUR FACE!" Santino FINALLY GETS THE HOT TAG and he's an ITALIAN HOUSE OF FIRE. DIving headbutt for two but Gabriel breaks it up and Kozlov takes him out to the floor. SANTINO GOES FOR THE COBRA ON EVERYBODY +BUT+ SLATER AND SLATER NAILS HIM FOR THE PIN - NEXUS RETAINS.

Santino gets a 5-on-1 beating as the RAW GM DINGS IN. "I have just received an e-mail from the ANONYMOUS Raw General Manager." Lawler: "That sound speaks for itself Cole (you dumbass) we know that." Cole: "AND I QUOTE - in the upcoming WWE match (WHAT?!) Nexus is banned from ringside. If any member of Nexus (WHAT?!) attempts to interfere in the match (WHAT?!) the entire Nexus will be suspended. Therefore I advise the entire Nexus to leave IMMEDIATELY." They heed the ANONYMOUS GM's orders and leave. A promo package for the main event starts at 10:16 ET.

* Randy Orton {C} vs. Wade Barrett (Special Ref John Cena Freed or Fired)

Special guest referee John Cena enters first at 10:20 ET. He's booed before walking out, then cheered as he finally arrives. He's got on the striped referee shirt, both of his purple wristbands, and one Nexus armband on his left arm. Wade Barrett's music hits a minute later and Justin Roberts introduces the challenger. Cena blatantly ignores Barrett and goes to make sure the turnbuckles are tightened and the ropes are secured. Barrett points at Cena and reminds him to do his job once he finishes. Orton's music hits at 10:23. Orton eyes Cena warily as he steps into the ring before climbing to the second rope to pose with his title. Cena holds out his hand and waits for Orton to reluctantly hand over his title. Orton does, Cena shows it to the challenger, then hands it to the timekeeper.

The bell rings at 10:26 and we're officially underway. Barrett and Orton spend the first 20-30 seconds just staring at each other. Orton charges in for a tie-up. The fans immediately start chanting for a RKO. Barrett is pushed into the corner and Orton follows the rules and gives a clean break. Orton charges the ropes and knocks Barrett down with a shoulder tackle. Barrett shakes it off and wrings out his neck. Orton with a side headlock takeover as referee Cena looks on. Barrett counters into a leg triangle but Orton escapes and hits another shoulder tackle off the ropes. Barrett finally gets Orton into the corner and starts wailing on Orton with punches and kicks. Orton responds by hitting a clothesline out of the opposite corner when he gets free, followed by a kick to the chest and an uppercut. He moves Barrett to a different corner, overwhelms him with punches, and Cena asks him for a clean break. Orton ignores him so Cena pulls him away and Randy's NOT pleased about it. Barrett gets back on offense afterward and gives Cena what we're supposed to believe is a knowing smile. Nothing doing because he does the exact same thing to Barrett when Wade ignores him. Wade is perplexed. He argues with Cena who audibly says YOU DO THAT AGAIN I'LL TAKE YOU OUT. He turns around and eats a dropkick from Orton.

Challenger and champion both wind up out on the floor, and Barrett charges him back first into the ring apron two times to soften him up, then whips him into the steel steps to do more damage. Barrett tells Cena to get back in the ring then throws Orton in to make a cover for 2. Barrett throws punches and makes another near fall. Randy is whipped to the corner hard and Orton sells his face and neck. Barrett stands on him then pulls him out of the corner by the leg for a one count. Barrett applies a choke and Orton fights his way up slowly. Barrett hits a knee to the gut and a boot to the face for a near fall. Cena makes sure we all hear him say it was ONLY 2. Barrett goes back to the choke again. Orton tries to get out again then falls back down to a knee. Orton gets up a second time and hits a fallaway slam leaving both men down.

Cena doesn't bother with the double count, remembering the rules that only pinfalls or submissions count (nice bit of logic there). We get the BOO and YAY punches for Barrett and Orton before the latter hits a scoop slam and wipes Barrett out over the ropes to the floor. He follows Barrett out but gets countered back and head first into the steel ringpost. Wade throws him back in as the crowd chants BAR-RETT SUCKS. Orton catches him coming back in and tries to drag him in by the leg but gets poked in the eye. Cena warns him not to do it. Orton recovers and gets another near fall. Barrett recovers and jumps off the second rope for an elbow to the chest for a near fall. Barrett argues with Cena and he says the shoulder came up "at two and a half." Barrett throws Orton down again and Cena again tells Barrett the shoulder was up before 3. Wasteland is countered but Barrett hits a BLACK HOLE SLAM (Striker actually called it such) for a near fall. Barrett is getting more and more pissed and arguing more and more with Cena.

Orton recovers and hits the DRAPING DDT and starts HEARING VOICES. Barrett rolls out to avoid the RKO. The crowd was chanting LET'S GO CENA and CENA SUCKS the whole time. Orton throws Barrett back in but Wade hits a knee right to the head and picks Orton up for Wasteland. WASTELAND CONNECTS. Barrett rolls him over and makes the cover but ORTON GRABS THE ROPES BEFORE 3. Barrett has had enough and SHOVES Cena. Cena gets that look on his face, SHOVES BARRETT BACK RIGHT INTO A RKO AND ORTON MAKES THE PIN AND RETAINS THE TITLE!

There was a moment of hesitation before Cena made the three count, but he made it anyway. Orton is stunned that Cena actually did the right thing, even at the cost of his own job. Nonetheless Orton jumps on the apron to celebrate. Cena takes off his shirt, his Nexus armband, goes to attack Barrett, and NEXUS ALL RUN DOWN TO MAKE THE SAVE. They get Barrett the hell out of Dodge. Cena throws his Nexus armband at them. Heath Slater goes to retrieve it. Cena goes over to the timekeeper, picks up the title, gets in the ring and stares down at it for a long time before walking over to give it to Orton. He hands Orton the title, gives him a hug, and walks away. Orton looks over at him and pounds his chest as he climbs the ropes again, this time holding up the championship over his head. A depressed Cena is slumped down on the ropes in the corner, looking on. Orton leaves with the belt in tow, looking back at Cena as he does so. He stops halfway up the ramp and turns around to look at Cena again before walking away. Orton poses one more time at the top of the ramp and leaves.

The PPV is not off the air though. Back in the ring Cena takes off his CeNation armbands and leaves them in the center of the ring. The crowd chants CE-NA, CE-NA and gives him a rousing cheer of support. Cena saltes the fans on all three sides before leaving. He goes out to give the announcers dap and then goes over to give Rick the Sign Guy a big hug. He stops to greet and hug heartbroken fans on the ramp as he walks away, then turns around to look back one more time as almost the entire building cheers for him. He gets a big smile on his face, points toward the crowd and says "this is for you" and then walks up to the top of the ramp.

Cena stands at the entranceway as multiple cameras give us different views of his face, the crowd chants CE-NA again and before the PPV can go off the air he goes out into the crowd to meet Cena fans and show his appreciation for everybody who supported him. Event Staff keep a close eye on things as he hugs fans and shakes hands with everyone in sight including tons of little kids. Security start ushering him to head out but Cena keeps on high-fiving fans and ignoring them. Finally he heads back to the ramp at 10:51 ET, salutes one more time, walks out and the PPV goes off the air.

2 comments: on "WWE Survivor Series Recap"

Kathy said...

so, i actually decided to buy the PPV...i think its the first time i ever have, i was kinda bored and was interested in a few of the matches. Anywho, i was pleasantly surprised and enjoyed the whole thing made a snack during the womens match but saw Natty in the ring crying...that was sweet. So glad Orton retained and Jomo kicked some ass :)

Hipnosis said...

Donnie's gonna be PISSSED Thursday lol XD....AAAWWWWWEEESSOOOMMEE!!