Tha Champ Is Who?

Sitting here thinking about wrestling as I do less and less each passing month and I was recalling a conversation I had with a co-worker about champions. We were discussing CM Punk’s feud with John Cena and the rushniciousness of the entire thing. Then we started talking about Smackdown. He asked me about the champ and I went blank. No, I didn’t go blank.

I went fucking blank.

Like, I couldn’t even begin to recall who was the champ or who had it before whoever had it then. I had to do some Inception, Total Recall, Matrix, Momento type shit and think back to what people bitched about months ago.

“Okay, The Miz. No one likes him and he was brought up often She he has to be involved, right? Oh, and Cena! Cena for sure. Okay. Hmm. Wait, CM Punk had a feud with Rey-Rey at some point in time. Right? Oh! Rey just won the belt! Shit. He lost it to Cena. But Alberto Del Rio has it now. But didn’t Punk have it? Damn it all!”

I went online and checked this nonsense out. There have been four champions (Punk, Mysterio, Cena, and Del Rio) in less than a month. Read that again, O-Ster’s. In one month four different people have held what is allegedly one of the grandest prizes in sports entertainment. I was also following the wrong show.

I have written articles bitching at fans about bitching about wrestling. But I’d be hard pressed to defend this right here. There is absolutely no reason for this many champion switches in less than a month. And who is the biggest victim in all this? No, not the fans. Stop being selfish.

Alberto Del Rio.

I like the guy. He’s athletic. He’s a dick. And his finisher doesn’t require prayer before attempting. Should he have won the title back at Wrestlemania? Yes. Should he have waited until he was on Raw before getting the belt? No. This guy looks like a star. He moves like one. You could put him on a late night talk show and have an intelligent looking wrestler. Not like HHH who looks like Conan stuffed into a tuxedo (which is a terrible film by the way) or The Miz who looks like a goober in general. So just like with my past failed relationships, I will blame WWE for the fact that I had to figure out who the hell was champion on one of their shows and not myself.

Oh, and Christian apparently had the belt. This is what happens when I spend too much time watching El Generico and KENTA videos on Youtube.

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