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9.25.2009

Tha "iMPACT!" Playback

It’s the iMPACT! Zone, after the fallout from No Surrender. In case you missed it, No Surrender was great!

We open iMPACT! with a recap video package of the crowning of AJ Styles at the PPV. The show starts with the MEM in the ring. Angle says he did not lose the TNA title, he was not beaten by AJ. What’d I tell ya, look for Matt to screw Angle and AJ or Sting to win the strap and that’s what happened.

AJ is young and Sting’s on his way out so it made sense to give the strap to AJ. Hey Kurt can you say "jail" buddy?

The World Elite comes out and interrupts Angle and the MEM and makes demands. At least Eric Young has turned it around. He used to run around kissing ass, now he’s trying to kick ass.

Booker, by the way, you’re killin me with the accents, are you African, English, American? Pick one pal and stick with it. You’re confusing us….bi polar maybe??? Props to Booker for not letting Young punk him off tho’.

First match of the night, my boy Suicide takes on The Pope. Again…Pope attacks Suicide as he makes his way to the ring just like Suicide did to The Pope at NS. I’m not mad at the feud; I’d just like to see Suicide win some instead of jobbing to The Pope. This match was hardcore all the way. I loved when The Pope used the hockey stick. Suicide spring boards and collides with The Pope, awesome! Suicide Solution and I get my wish! Suicide beats The Pope!

Team 3D, blah, blah, blah. If you like these guys sorry. Overrated all the way!

Nash gets Sexy, “stay wet my friends”. Classic. Nash seems to be giving the Big Booty Daddy a run for his money in the ladies department.

Rhino and Devon go in immediately. Count out within two minutes? Epic fail of the night. Both men out for blood but let em go in for God’s sake….Rhino and Devon bleeding all over the place. Brother Ray asks why they are fighting. Tomato, it’s wrestling pal that’s what ya do ,fight! Props to Rhino for the Gore to Brother Ray. The War Machine don’t back down.

Morgan offers to team up with Hernandez! Awesome! Hernandez is a big guy, but he looked small standing beside Matt Morgan. Matt can have a bright future if he gets his shit together!

AJ Styles is the new TNA Heavyweight Champion; we get a history lesson on his career in the form of a video package.

AJ comes out for his coronation. I can just see AJ holding the WWE IC Title or the WWE Title or the real Championship, the World Heavyweight belt. AJ thanks Sting and brings him out. Took 20 years for Sting to not wear make up in public all the time. That shit must be tiring, bet he thinks it’s a bad idea now compared to the 80’s. Sting gives Styles his props.

AJ says basically Sting gave him the title but taking out Morgan??? AJ says Sting passed him the torch, not quite. Styles challenges Sting for the strap at Bound for Glory in Sting’s hometown. Sting accepts and we’re on. Teacher vs. Student.

New TNA Knockouts Tag Champs Taylor Wylde and Serita take on Tara and Knockout Champ
ODB in their first tag title defense as newly crowned champs. Taz says Deaner put up a good fight against ODB at NS. Dude you were there, what fight? Deaner got his ass handed to him by ODB.

Kong interrupts and fights to the back with Tara. ODB is left to fend for herself and Taylor gets the win. Am I wrong for sayin' I’d hit ODB? Tara tries to explain…hmmmm…let’ em scrap for the strap.

Foley’s in the back with JB, Lethal and Creed. A Whodunit???

Daniels gets another title shot in a three way X Division Championship against the Champ Samoa Joe and Homicide.

At least Homicide never rolled over and died, he’s still in the game. Action packed match, and second title defense of the night. Homicide counts his chickens before they hatch and falls victim to King Kong Samoa Joe, can you say "submission"? At least Joe lives up to his name.

Angle teams up with Eric Young to battle Hernandez & Matt Morgan. Hernadez manhandles Angle and Young. First Latino TNA Champion!?. Angle sells out Young and WE members confront Angle. Kurt fears Morgan.

British Invasion tries to corner Angle till Steiner and Booker reinforce. The WE get punk’d. MEM is still the ruling faction in TNA. NWO all day and as close as I’m gonna get to an NWO return. Sorry I was a NWO fan, I loved the heel Hogan. I do see a feud between the WE and MEM. This match was too short for my liking. Hernadez vs. Styles vs Sting in a 3-way dance. That’s what I wanna see at B4G.

Back in the back with Mick, interrogation? Foley’s trying to find out who broke his picture of him and JB.

Motor City Machine Guns shed some light…The Stinkoramas! Mick’s lookin for the perp….don’t you mean "purp" Mick? Put it in the air!

Alyssa Flash welcomes Hamada by interrupting her interview and givin her a beat down. Yankee style.

Nash tries to keep it sexy and gets played and jacked by Dr. Stevie. “Don’t you ever rob me again”? How about trying to jack Nash pal. Stevie’s dead meat, you know Kev won’t stand for that attack.

Bobby Fagley takes on Jethro Holiday in his iMPACT! debut. I think I hate Bobby more than John Cena and that’s saying a lot. Quick match, Holiday taps real fast. “The Boss” Bobby Lashley, makes me wanna upchuck.

Foley solves the case…Main Event time. Foley and Mankind, I mean Abyss take on tag champs Steiner and Booker T.

Pure title matches tonite, way to go TNA. WWE take notes….Booker and Steiner dominate, then Foley turns on Abyss leaving him to lose. After the match Mick makes his way back to the ring. “It was you Chris”! Mankind flips on Abyss. Abyss was the perp? Foley says Abyss cost him the Legend’s title and ensues a beatdown bloodbath pon Abyss. Here’s a feud I’d like to see. Props to TNA for the fresh feuds. iMPACT! goes off the air with a bloody Abyss asking Foley “Why?”!

TNA, don’t let up!

Tha Results:
Suicide def. The Pope
Brother Devon & Rhino get a double count out.
Taylor Wylde & Serita def. ODB & Tara
Samoa Joe def. Daniels & Homicide
Matt Morgan & Hernandez def. Eric Young & Kurt Angle
Bobby Lashley def. Jethro Holiday
Scott Steiner & Booker T def. Mick Foley & Abyss


2 comments: on "Tha "iMPACT!" Playback"

Hipnosis said...

Donnie dosen't like TNA cause he's too much of a Matt Morgan Mark XD

Christopher Casúr said...

SHOOOOOOOOOOOT!

Matt Morgan and Hernandez are both future TNA Champions, no worries.