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8.25.2009

Five Stages Of Grief

Lately there has been a lot of complaining from wrestling fans. Lots. We complain about the shows (TNA "iMPACT!", "Raw", "SmackDown!", and to a lesser extent ROH).

I may as well throw Indy wrestling in there while I’m at it. Has it always been this way or has the internet made it more noticeable? I want to break this down in a therapeutic way. Allow me to introduce you to the five stages of grief as a wrestling fan.

Step 1 - Denial

“Man, Raw was shit this week. I bet next week will be better. Angrymarks said that Cena and HHH are both filming movies soon so with them out of the way new guys will be allowed to shine!”

No, it wont. There have been plenty of times where HHH, Cena, HBK, or Taker have been out injured and not many guys have stepped up. Funny how we scream about no new talent being built while ignoring the fact that the champion is Randy Orton. Dude hasn’t been around for 15 years, ya’ll. Raw was bad this week. It will be bad next week and the week after.

Step 2 - Anger

“What the fuck, man?! Who booked this shit?! How are they gonna have Carlito go over on Ric Flair? I’m not watching this again! I’m serious this time. I know I’ve said it for the past five years but this time I am dead serious!”

Is this you? We all get mad while watching wrestling. Some of us just go a step beyond that and write entire articles laced with nothing but negative shit to say. Look. There are tons of wrestling sites and message boards to check out for people screaming about a free show where guys can be killed at any moment or seriously injured. Sometimes we seriously need to just calm down and get caught in the show. If that means not checking out spoilers (which I find very helpful) or not going to message boards where people will just throw gasoline into your fire then so be it. Wishing harm on another wrestler does nothing (I recently read on a message board where someone said if Cody Deanor got seriously injured they would not care).

Step 3 - Bargaining

“Okay. I’ll watch Raw this week but only for the second hour. The first hour is nothing but talking and I wont miss anything, right? And I’ll only order Wrestlemania and Summer Slam. Oh, and maybe Survivor Series. And the Royal Rumble. But that’s it!”

Sure. I do the same thing. I’ll watch Raw online and the next thing you know I am looking up ROH shit and then some old TNA. You’ll buy a shirt. You’ll check out the show when its in town. If you’re a true wrestling fan you never give up on it. Yes, you may watch more MMA now but you still keep up with every single weekly show no matter how much you say you don’t want to. Mark.

Step 4 - Depression

“I cant believe I spent $60 on this horseshit. Never again. I mean, seriously? CM Punk is the champ? Again? I…I’m done. This is the worst day of my life. Forget grannies funeral. Forget losing my left testicle in that accident. This is the single worst day of my life. Maybe even human history. Where’s my bible…?”

We get so sad when someone we like is treated unfairly. This is all in our eyes as we are not the ones that get into that ring and grapple with sweaty men (if that’s you thing then its cool). I have seen people get so damned upset when something happens that they sound like they wanna kill themselves. Don’t feel so down, man. It’ll get better. This is the part where I keep from laughing.

Step 5 - Acceptance

Most of us are stuck in Stage 4 and very few make it to Step 5. Those of us past a certain age (I am currently 30) need to realize that this isn’t what we grew up watching. There is no next Hogan, Austin, or Rock. There’s the current CM Punk, Randy Orton, and Jack Swagger. What we grew up watching slowly died a while back and we have two choices on how to handle it: Stop watching or keep bitching. Because we’re gonna get glimmers of hope once in a while but it will never be the show it used to be.

What stage are you at?


4 comments: on "Five Stages Of Grief"

JellysAreSound said...

I'm kinda in 3 and 5. I'll never be pissed as people do be like the C.M Punk hater on YouTube. I was kinda forced into stage 3 since I lost the channels that show WWE but I had been trying to get out of watching it for a while but I knew I never could do it on my own, I had to be forced out. At least now it doesn't rule my time schedule hahaha

Joe the 5'9" said...

Randy Orton has had as many title matches as Cena, HHH, Edge and Dave Batista.

Chris said...

Nice article, maybe I'm in denial but I don't feel like I'm mad at wrestling and honestly I'm glad it's not like when I was growing up because I got tired of that crap. It always cracks me up when people talk about how good it used to be, especially when they're talking about the 80's. Go back and watch it, not with the memories of how good you thought it was, not with twelve year old pre pubescent eyes but with everything you know now and all the 'insider' info you have. Then tell me Hacksaw was a good wrestler, then tell me the Bushwackers were an awesome tag team.
Maybe it's me but I see Randy Orton and I think he's a phenomenal heel, I watch the way he takes the easiest way out every time, the way he ducks opponents. Even his style screams heel to me. I see John Cena and I see someone who, if he'd been wrestling in the 80's, would have been Hulk Hogan and everyone would be talking about how great the Cena Andre match was. Everyone would have a funny story about how they used to give there little brother the big leg... er excuse me the five knuckle shuffle.
Has wrestling changed? Yes and I think for the better. Better athletes, better performers, better production, and thanks to WCW mainstreaming the product it isn't viewed with such disdain by people who don't 'get it'.
I just don't get why so many wrestling fans are so mad at wrestling.
Of course if they let me book the shows it would be better, goes without saying.

D. Ross said...

Thanks everyone. Chris makes some good points in regards to looking at old shows with older eyes. I see some of my favorite old cartoons online and after the theme song I'm like "What was I smoking?" Some matches survive the test of time but 90% of them dont.

And for the record, I would rather my brother give me a legdrop (he prefered the Figure Four, DDT, and Spinebuster) than half the crazy shit out there nowadays. If he had ever given me an RKO, Pedigree, or Canadian Destroyer I would be typing this through a speech recognition program and moving around my place with a hose that I blow into. Dont be nasty.