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Tha Raw Report

Damn! I can't believe how quickly "Raw" is turning back into must-see TV. That ending of "Raw" was pure gold. I prayed that Vince returning would mean something. I knew it was long odds, and the whole night I tried not to contemplate his return, believing it would lead to another dud bombshell announcement. And then, out of nowhere, Randy Orton kicks Vince's head clear off. Mike Vanderjagt would be proud of that kick!

This was not one of those glancing blows, either. I don't know if Vince told him to, or if Orton either botched it or took liberties, but that kick looked stiff. Props to Vince for finally adding to a storyline instead of making a storyline be about himself.

Of course, the Orton altercation was preceded by Chris Jericho coming out. His promo had absolutely no rhyme or reason, and was probably similar to the creative meetings regarding Kane. Sometimes ad libbing is good, but make sure the people ad libbing are really good at it. Upon Jericho leaving, there was a bad taste in my mouth, as I really thought that was the end of "Raw". But nope, WWE decided to end the show with their strongest storyline. Orton kicking the head off of Vince is a great move all around. He'll get tons of heat for it if they play their cards right, and for once, Vince will take a leave of absence for injury and there will actually be some sort of storyline benefit to it.

"Raw" was ultimately bookended by Legacy, as all three members competed in a six man Battle Royal that also featured Santino Marella, Kofi Kingston, and Glen Jacobs as Kane. Orton won after DiBiase sacrificed himself to eliminate Kane. Again, great story building. They're not already teasing tension, which happens waaaay too much in wrestling nowadays. Props to WWE for racking this angle and making it not suck.

CM Punk is the new Intercontinental Champion. I like that they didn't completely rush the title switch, but it does still feel somewhat rushed. I almost think I'd have preferred if Punk and Regal faced each other at consecutive pay-per-views instead, with the results mimicking the past three weeks. That way, Regal could have rested up until Royal Rumble to get better, and in all likelihood, you would then get three much longer and much better matches. Plus, three pay-per-views from now is WrestleMania. What better night for one of your bigger faces to win a big belt that you are hopefully trying to add prestige to? Hopefully this feud is not over, though, because these two can go in the ring.

I'm done talking about Rey Mysterio. I don't care if he headlines this year's WrestleMania, I'm done talking about him. You're only entertaining for so long when you do the same flips and dips. Forget assclown; he's a gasclown, and I'm tapping. Mike Knox would be better suited on ECW, though, where there aren't guys who are much bigger than him and you can book him as a monster.

Cryme Tyme won a title match last night by defeating Miz and Morrison. I wonder how long it will take before they actually get their title shot this time.

Santino didn't say much last night, but I loved his "Can we keep her? Pleeeeease?" when he pitched the idea of Rosa Mendez working as an intern. With the way things unfolded, I had an idea. Forget the whole stalker angle; pair Mendez and Beth up, and create an all-diva stable with Santino as the mouthpiece. It's not the best idea, but at least it's not another damn stalker angle.

Big props to WWE for their video package on the Royal Rumble. It's nice to know that they're trying to put this event over to the fans as something big and something important, because it really is. And this year, quite frankly, I'm hoping that it's used to make a new star. The only guy I can really see winning is Triple H, and that would be a waste of the match were he to win. I say use the match to put somebody like John Morrison or MVP in the main event picture. Or, if you're really dead set on having a guy who's already a main eventer win it, Randy Orton, because that would be another great way to propel the Legacy storyline.

I'm excited about Royal Rumble this year. They certainly can't do much worse than they have the past three years (2006 was the worst Royal Rumble ever, 2007 and 2008 are not far behind), so hopefully WWE will do like the event's theme and "bring the fire". Go Steelers.

Tha Results:
*Melina def. Jillian
*Cryme Tyme def. World Tag Team Champions The Miz & John Morrison
*Rey Mysterio def. Mike Knox by disqualification
*CM Punk def. Intercontinental Champion William Regal in a No Disqualification Match for the title
*Women’s Champion Beth Phoenix def. Kelly Kelly
*Randy Orton won a Six-Man Over-the-Top Rope Challenge Match

17 comments: on "Tha Raw Report"

Kathy said...

I'm glad your review was posted so soon. I watched Raw tonight and got excited about it a few times...not including the womens matches,why they even bother I have no idea. I know some ppl think Cena sucks on the mic, but I kinda thought he was gonna sway HBK. Also, I hate Vinces' "character" so that punt kick was sweet to watch, and Orton really sold that look of disgust with himself. Is this the beginning of the turn to face?

Go Cryme Tyme !!

Matt said...

Cena really needs to stop yelling

The HBK/JBL program gets better and better every week, and hopefully they do it right and it leads to a match between the two for the belt at mania. It's an old-school slow-burning feud between two great workers that should end with a payoff on the biggest stage for the biggest belt. In other words, if Cena's in the wrestlemania main event for Raw, everyone should be fired.

Mike Knox's promo interview with Grisham was gold

Unfortunately, I think that was the end of the Punk/Regal feud

The million dollar giveaway did a great job of pulling in the ratings and adding intrigue to the show, huh

Why couldn't Steph drop trow and make Jericho join the kiss my ass club.

That's all

Christopher Casúr said...

Oh my God. I completely forgot to talk about the Cena/JBL/HBK promo. Holy shit, no wonder people want me fired.

Just to make up for that...I enjoyed the promo. I think Cena did a fine job on the stick last night as far as his promo driving the storyline and trying to sway HBK, as you mentioned, Kathy, although he then went on and proved a point made by an O-ster last week (can't remember who exactly said it, which is embarrassing because it was a regular too) in that he started off good, but then he took it too far. You're not Samuel L. Jackson, and this is not a beer commercial; please stop yelling at me. And, of course, Michaels and JBL were right on the money as always.

Dante Ross said...

I totally missed Punk/Regal. So I wont comment on it. I just hope it lived up to everyones expectations. This was a feud folks were looking forward to.

Melina won with one move. She's the new Goldberg, I guess. Thank God Santino had something to do with that match. Maybe he should be involved in every chick fight. At least it'd be funny as opposed to...not.

I am so pissed that Cryme Tyme won the way they did. MnM2 had me laughing with their Obama quote. That shit was funny.

Guess I missed Kellyx2 vs Beth as well. Damn.

Orton is so damned good. I loved his reaction after nailing Vince. It wasnt a look at him turning face as much as it was him thinking, "Oh, shit. I just kicked my BOSS in the head..." Okay show overall. I'll check out ECW online and see if thats good.

Oh, and Cena lost me once he started shouting, too. There was no need to pander to the crowd. He was talking to HBK and should've kept it low and to the point.

Max said...

I couldnt care less about jbl/michaels/cena right now. the legacy angle is just so amazing that, thats the only reason im gnna start watching raw from now on.....and also santino

Anonymous said...

Title for Title
CM Punk vs John Cena

Legend vs Legend Killer
Austin vs Orton

Jericho vs Undertaker


WWE Championship
Edge vs Triple H

Jeff Hardy vs Christian

The Brian Kendrick vs R-Truth vs Shelton Benjamin vs Kofi Kingston vs Evan Bourne vs Matt Hardy vs MVP vs Rey Mysterio

Tag Titles vs Tag Titles
John Morrison/The Miz vs Colon Brothers

ECW Championship
Swagger vs Dreamer

Women's Title
Beth vs Melina vs Mickie

Big Show/Kane/Vladimir Kozlov/Mark Henry/The Great Khali/Umaga

Yes, CM Punk is my dark horse pick for the rumble.
Orton/Austin is fantasy booking through Orton saying he'll make it up to Vince McMahon by taking out his biggest nemesis, Stone Cold Steve Austin. Plus with this angle being started in the go-home show, I can actually see Orton not winning the rumble and Orton/Austin meaning much more long-term than Orton/Cena.
John Morrison and The Miz should be featured in their own match and not thrown in to a cluster MITB match at this point, and highlighting the tag belts for at least Mania.
JBL/HBK doesn't need a title for a complete storyline. And CM Punk/John Cena is at the very least extremely intriguing with the help of both titles being on the line.
Divas title is not even dark match worthy.

Anonymous said...

Austin vs Orton is really the true and best way the go. Not Cena/Orton, it won't mean anywhere near as much.

Have Vince in Austin's corner and Steph in Orton's.

I now believe Orton will NOT win the Rumble.

Matt said...

MVP or HBK to win the rumble. HBK will be a surprise entry

Dante Ross said...

Austin is not coming back. I hope he doesnt. He cant put on the kind of match that I expect from him and I respect that he knows that. We all know what it looks like when someone cant perform to their best but wont hang 'em up.

Anonymous said...

you might wanna forget about the women's championship being defended at wrestlemania because there has been talks of michelle mccool vs trish stratus at mania not sure if the divas title is on the line though.

Skitlez said...

Damn Cena, nice way to make a serious promo turn into your typical pandering. How the hell would Cena think his comeback at Michaels is convincing? Michaels says he needs money cause he has real problems and responsibilities and needs to take care of his family and Cena says "But you're the show stoppper! The main eventer!". Your point is what? Sounded retarded.

Orton's face after the kick was...well, priceless. He sold it perfectly. I like the idea of Orton being this out of control bad tempered heel. The guy that not even "Mr. Mcmahon" can control.

I have a feeling Santino will leave Beth for Rosa, turning Beth face against Santino and his newer, younger Glamazon.

Overall, Raw was in rare form tonight.

TimTS said...

Normally I like to go through the whole show and comment on it but tonight is different. Even though there were other things going on, the only thing that sticks in my head is of course the kick from Orton. I thought it looked vicious live, but after the replay my jaw dropped. I'm trying to think of the last time an angle made my jaw drop and I haven't come up with anything yet. I might have to go all the way back to when The Road Warriors took the spike to Dusty's eye. I am a happy wrestling fan at this moment. =)

Downtown said...

Unanimously Raw was entertaining last night, very rare to hear around here. So good no one even cried for Casur's resignation.

I popped out loud a good 7-8 times last night (kinda awkward to do when no one else is there). Most of my O's were for the Regal/Punk match. The layout wasn't phoned in and im sucker for stiff work. Punk worked the crowd well, hell they were poppin before his music even hit.

But Orton stole it with that kick, not the mention the slap to McMahon's Jaw. I see why everyone liked his reaction, but I would've been just as happy had he went from "oh shit! what did i do?" to being proud of it, at least a smirk.

Cena does shout for no reason and in the wrong places.

Downtown said...

I know it was very short, but the Cody/Dustin confrontation was nice as well, it went further than a cheap merch plug.

Bukkake Devil said...

Anybody can tell me what is going on with Mickie James? And before I get the post on her being in a car accident, that was last week. She has only been on backstage segments the past 3 weeks. Is there a reason she is not in matches? Injury, contract dispute, no story?

I am only sorry that every body was chanting "RKO" last night and not "Your going to get your Fucking head kicked in."

Dante Ross said...

With Mickie it almost seems that if she isnt going for the title no one knows what to do with her. Running down her creditials made me laugh, honestly. Who is even gonna remember her title reigns? Cody is a great actor since he didnt crack up.

Loved seeing Cody and Goldendust together. I saw an interview with Cody where he talked about missing out on Dustin's career when Goldust was hot. Nice to see them in the same company.

Anonymous said...

does anyone agree that santino has been looking like joe rogan recently with his growing beard/stubble??