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3.12.2008

Extreme Edition

We're once again on the road to WrestleMania, and this year, it seems that ECW might have a slightly larger role in The Granddaddy Of Them All. Another ECW superstar has qualified for Money In The Bank, and the ECW Championship will be defended at WrestleMania this year, albeit in a semi-bastardized way.

However, in case you needed a reminder (editor's note: you don't), this is still WWE, and as much as anyone tries to look on the bright side, it's still not perfect.

Miz and Morrison are still the tag team champions after last night. I get that Delaney and Dreamer would be no less of a makeshift tag team than Miz and Morrison, and I also get that a lot of people are starting to take a shine to the new MNM, but I personally am not. I think that both of them would be better suited as singles competitors, preferably on the indies for seperate reasons (Morrison because he's an arrogant dickhole and Miz because he still sucks in the ring).

I'm hoping that those titles get defended at Mania with at least one legit tag team in the match. Ideally, I would book a four corners match between MNM 2.0, Jesse and Festus, Colin Delaney & Tommy Dreamer, and Deuce & Domino.

Speaking of the boys from the other side of the tracks, Deuce took on Kofi Kingston one on one in a match that saw Kofi boo, kick, and win. Memo to The Black Prophet-Who gives a shit if this guy isn't really Jamaican? Deuce isn't really from the 50's, and Festus isn't really an inbred retarded swampboy. It's a gimmick, stop crying racism at every turn. Yeah, it exists, but not to the extent your hate speeches make it out to be.

The aforementioned Festus had a match last night against Elijah Burke. I'm not sure why Burke was offered up as job meat to the big man, there are plenty of other guys on ECW who could've done the trick. For instance, to No-tastic Mike Knox.

Instead of jobbing, Knox made another appearance after Stevie Richards lost to The Great Khali. I just don't get what WWE sees in this guy. He's not a good worker, he's not charismatic, he's not big enough to satisfy McMahon's hard-on for giants...I just don't get it, why is this guy still around? Can anyone explain that to me?

Getting back to my original point, that being WrestleMania XXIV and ECW's involvement, Armando Alejandro (editor's note: FUCK YOU, E! That was the best gimmick you've made in years, and you fucked it up!) Estrada announced that the pre-WrestleMania battle royal will now have an added incentive-the winner will get to face Chavo Guerrero that same night for the ECW Championship.

I guess I sort of understand this booking, but only if it were to happen on free TV. Having that random of a match at WrestleMania XXIV is stupid. The only guy who has a backstory with Chavo going into 'Mania is already tied up that night. That man being CM Punk, who qualified for Money In The Bank last night by defeating Big Daddy V via countout.

So Punk has now punched himself a ticket to WrestleMania XXIV, gay new shirt and all. Seriously, I hate the design of his new shirt. It didn't look cool when bands used that design on merchandise, and it doesn't look good now. Seeing him in that shirt makes me think that next week, he's going to come out with some girl who's got hair like The Miz, only dyed cat vomit yellow, who's about 5 feet tall, slightly pudgy, and cuts more frequently than an obsessive-compulsive butcher. God, I hate whoever designed that shirt.

John Morrison & The Miz def. Tommy Dreamer & Colin Delaney
The Great Khali def. Stevie Richards
Kofi Kingston def. Deuce
Festus def. Elijah Burke
CM Punk def. Big Daddy V to qualify for Money In The Bank


1 comments: on "Extreme Edition"

metal god said...

"Instead of jobbing, Knox made another appearance after Stevie Richards lost to The Great Khali. I just don't get what WWE sees in this guy. He's not a good worker, he's not charismatic, he's not big enough to satisfy McMahon's hard-on for giants...I just don't get it, why is this guy still around? Can anyone explain that to me?"

Until the mention of McMahon, those statements could have applied to Knox OR Khali. they're equally worthless.