Check This Out...

12.22.2007

FNF: Edge-Heads Unite!

For the past few weeks people have had different views on Edge's return, and Edge's storyline with Vickie. Over the past year-plus here on Tha O Show there hasn't been much debate, basically just a reaming of Batista on his inability to do...anything. He's even been called quite Bati!

So tonight's "SmackDown!" wasn't one that alot was expected of, but in many ways it did indeed deliver. It had a few good matches, a few good in-ring promos, the last of the good commentary, but there were also some moments that make you say, "O, no." There were a few bad matches, and for the last match, some really, really bad commentary.

So without further ado, it's time for me to bring to you this weeks edition of Friday Night Fallout!

The card looked average to put it best. Khali and Skid mark Singh taking on Finlay and Horny McMahon. The face pop that Finlay got upon his entrance, while it could be attributed to Hornswaggle, was still pretty big and it really spoke to what was discussed on this weeks Show. I think now, that Finlay is pretty over as a babyface, and the funny part wasn't really the deciding factor. While it was Hornswaggle, I feel pretty confident saying that Finlay would get them either way now, and he could hold them on his own for a while.

Did anybody see Skid mark shirtless and think Fronte minus about 150? I'm sure that Fronte is more of a hairy guy, but that shit that Skid mark had going on, on his chest was pretty much gay. You're either hairy or you aren't. What he had going on was a metro sexual who just gave up halfway through the waxing process. I'd have marked out for a Steve Carrel smiley face though. Sadly, there have been times when I really wished that Khali wasn't even in the company, and my only knowledge of him was from "The Longest Yard."

I've often wondered what WWE's creative department gets paid. I think you should subtract 500k a year from it. I'm sure they don't make that much, which is good, because they should be paying something back. The things that seem the best come from the best performers, and I'm sure most of that is their shit. Whoever did the spot of the feathers, if they were feathers, and the water, and the bucket shots should be fired. What in God's name was that? The bucket to the head was cool, but the bucket to the balls that was sold as a head shot was not.

Ric Flairs return interview had me hyped. Call me a mark, call me whatever, but Ric Flair still gets my attention. It was awesome to see that "Merry Christmas" elicited a pop. How many times in their career have guys like Snitsky or Umaga got a pop like that, heel or face? No matter how hard the E pushes some guys it doesn't take, and no matter how much they try to bury Flair, that doesn't take either. You think the E would figure out that sometimes, no matter what the average fans usually believe, there is some shit they won’t believe.

The 6 man tag team match was interesting on paper, and it converted well into the ring. The finish was pure shit! Anytime Rey gets a pin on a guy over 300lbs its over-kill. Had he pinned MVP, sure, but that wouldn't work right now, so no need to even have Rey get the pin. Had Rey hit a Shit-1-9 on Henry, then Kane with a choke slam followed by Punk coming in with a top rope something or another and having Punk get back his pinfall loss, that would have been different. Instead we got Punk taking himself and MVP out, allowing Rey to Shit19 on Henry into a choke slam from Kane and a frog-splash from Rey and Rey getting a pin. WHAT? WHY?

To me, a shitty finish can ruin a good match. Adversely a stellar finish can save a shitty match. Maybe because it's the last thing you see, and while it is visual, it's also emotional because it's the end of a match. This wouldn't work as much for the curtain jerker, but mid-card and up I think it applies. The teams in this match seemed to have a decent amount of chemistry, and I like the Monster team, but the push doesn't need to be excessive. I even kind of like Punk and Kane, but when you throw in Rey, it becomes knee.

Palumbo was a non-factor, and according to some Italian waiter, not French either. The Noble/McCool segment was pure gold. I've been saying forever that Noble needs the ball, and when he gets it he'll run with it. He won't go to the main event, but he'll be a strong, strong character. Noble tonight, showed that. He was awesome in the date with McCool. The waiter by the way played his part terribly. I O'd for Noble's, "You'd be speaking German" comments and several others. The Old Spice and magic trick were also highlights.

If the E doesn't take this ball and run with it, they are, again, Willie Parker in the rain. I can see this going into Michelle costing Palumbo a meaningful match against Noble, well, a match as meaningful as possible in that situation. Or the obligatory, swerve of Noble with the wrapped around the finger gimmick. My only gripe about the segment was that Noble wasn't sporting a, "Noble 3-Palumbo 0" shirt. One other beef, albeit a slight one was the mention of his granny. Thought she died when he was with Nidia. To think it over, maybe I'll down a glass of MerloT!

At the top of the show there was a moment that made me say O! The Edge-Vickie video package was almost as good as the farewell video Edge did to, "Simply the Best." The see-saw was so incredibly stupid that it can only be described as pure genius. Changing the names of Brett and Brian Major was also a nice touch. I'm glad they're doing something with the Brothers Major, no, I'm sorry, Zack Ryder, and Curt Hawkins. I'm really going to have a hard time identifying them now. They look just like Edge, minus the Cro-Magnon forehead.

The main event was, well, it involved Bati-sta. You make your own judgment call. I thought the Edge-heads did quite well in carrying the match. Batista is so terrible he couldn't even take a "hung out to dry" spot from Edge when he was doing punches from the second rope on Curt Hawkins. KNEE! His faux celebration also seemed a might bit gay. Speaking of gay, how bad is Taz on the mic? Could you imagine Taz, Don West, Mike Tenay and Michael Cole on one show? I'd have to say, "Shoot me, in the groin!"

The highlight of the night, at least to Donnie, was JBL giving his Farewell Address. I popped for the Ben Hogan reference, and I doubt anybody else popped, or got it. No, Ben isn't Hulk's dad. I want to say that I'm glad to see JBL coming back to the ring. In one respect I am, because now I don't have to hear, "Ballgame Michael," at the end of every match. I'm also sick of hearing how much he hates Rey Mysterio, and how he built "SmackDown!" I'm upset though, because now Taz appears to be gearing for a "SmackDown!" return. Maybe Michael Hayes can join Cole at the table.

JBL gave a great promo, that of course was exaggerated, but exaggerated nicely nonetheless. He made some very good points, and to me, proved Donnie's point that he wouldn't come back to something meaningless. He basically buried the guys that were bitching. He WILL NOT come back to jerk the curtain in Poughkeepsie, NY. I doubt seriously that he'll wear the Big Gold, but he will definitely make an impact. How though, will "Raw" continue to utilize all the talent it has? Oh, hell, they aren't doing that anyway.

I'm not as big a JBL mark, fan, whatever you like to call it, as Donnie is, but I don't dislike JBL. I think maybe he can do big Tings on "Raw," but I wonder if his return will be full-time, or just a feud with Jericho and a short feud with someone else. I'd personally like to see JBL-HHH feud, just to see who got the wins. JBL isn't the only as he said, but certainly is, "A wrestling god."

I'm going to end this edition a little different. I'm going to completely rip-off Tha Show, and end this with some O's and No's.
O-Edge, entire night, from the video package to the finish of the main event.
No-Skid mark Singh
O-JBL's Farewell Address
No-Rey Mysterio getting a clean pin
O-Batista fucking up, again
No-Batista fucking up, again
O-Maryse, that chick is hot
No-The Santa match, it's sad when the E is ripping off TNA
O-Jamie Noble/Michelle McCool segment
No-The names, Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder
O-Ric Flair
And until next time, Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Quick results in case you missed it...
*Finlay & Hornswaggle def. Runjin Singh & Khali
*Santa Festus def. Santa Deuce...dead serious
*Rey Mysterio/Kane/ECW Champ CM Punk def. Big Daddy V/Mark Henry/MVP
*Batista def. Hawkins or Ryder
*Batista def. World Champion Edge via DQ


5 comments: on "FNF: Edge-Heads Unite!"

Anonymous said...

Silly Noble-San...Old Spice does not come in a spary bottle!!! LOL

Anonymous said...

Why all the hate for Mysterio? he fights solid matches, and seeing as how he was a former champ, i dont see the problem with him pinning the big man. Especially since he used to have that giant killer gimmick back in the day

Agreed that Noble and JBL are gold on the mic. I just wish they shot that segment in an actual resteraunt like they did with santino's date with maria on raw awhile back. It looked to me like they just set up one table in the middle of a big white locker room.

Also, I wish they brought jericho over to smacketh down instead of moving JBL to Raw. This would strengthen the upper mid-card, since it's pretty much non-existant on smackdown, and over abundant on raw with guys like kennedy, micheals, hhh, jericho, and now jbl.

I hate the gimmickness/gayness of the tag-teams that were meant to be teams instead of two singles wrestlers stuck together. I wish the burial of real teams would stop and we could get some real fueds for the tag belts.

I didnt mind the Finley/hornswaggle match as a comedy spot. It seems liek thats the direction Finley's character is going, which is ok with me, as he can work anything they give him.

I thought with the exception of the burial of two good tag teams in one match, it was a pretty solid show.

Anonymous said...

Matty I agree that everyone needs to stop shitting on Mysterio. No one cares about him but he don't suck!

I'd also like to voice my opinion that DJB is the worst writer on the site who rips off Dan and Donnie and shits on the most trivial things. In DJB's words as he's ripping off Dan and Donnie: KNEE!

D.J.B. said...

I'm actually ripping off Monolith, Dan's crew when I say knee.

I just dont care for Mysterio. He's not my favorite, sorry that that hurts so many people's feelings.

I don't think he's bad, I just don't care for him.

Anonymous said...

For some reason you can track Rey's shitaculorness to how many tattoos he has on his body. That ink did somethin' to that man.

Major's needed somethin' to do. Good for them. Its so rare that White boys get a chance to shine in wrestlin'. Us Blacks have been runnin' it for toolong like basketball and football.

The Shaminal needs to retire. This is me askin' for one of his muscles to explode while grabbin' a Divas fun bags.

Any Santa gimmicj that aint Santa comin' out during the show and getting his ass beat is useless. I don' wanna see no wrestlers each dressed as Santa. That match got "Two Balls Down."

Who are we all kiddin'? Better yet, who is Da E tryin' to kid? Just combine E.SHE.Dub and CrapDown already!

Khali is still employed. Yeah. Read that again. Did you feel that? That's what it feels like when your girl tells you she's pregnant after you just got fired.