If you thought last Monday’s draft was ridiculous, well baby – you ain’t seen nothing yet!The “results” of the supplemental draft were released today on The Vince McMahon Memorial site, formerly known as WWE.com. Talk about a litany of nonsensical, inexplicable movement. I’ll do my best to break it all down for you, but if you're expecting me to bust out my English-WWE, WWE-English Logic Dictionary, sorry kids you've come to the wrong guy.
One of the more intriguing aspects of the draft is the whole concept that teams or stables could or would be seperated. Dan-e-o challenged that last week by pointing out that Sharmelons and Booker were drafted to “Raw“ as a pair. Okay, fine. It’s his manager and his damn wife. We can let that slide, right?
Well today, the first pick in the supplemental draft was Paul London...AND Brian Kendrick. Both men are off to “Raw”. Allow me to do my best Stone Cold impression right now.
“What?” After years of establishing the rules, WWE shatters them with the first pick of the second round. I do seem to remember one other time the E pulled this move, but the explanation given was that the team was in possesion of the tag titles. Whatever, I can roll with that. But this? Just plain stupid. I also fear that as good as they are, The Hooliganz may get lost in the land of Monday Night Giants.
Kenny Dykstra is off to “SmackDown!”. Well they have to do SOMETHING with the Owen Hart look-a-like. He’s way too good to be toiling in a going-nowhere gimmick. Interesting though, that the company has once against pulled a couple engaged to be married apart by putting them on different brands. Now the big question is, how long before Edge has sex with Mickie James and gets Kenny fired?Viscera is off to ECW. Um. Okay.
The Sandman was then shipped off to “Raw”. One of the few remaining ECW Originals, Sandman was one of the Bingo Hall poster boys. Having him on “Raw” just doesn’t make sense to me. Why not put Marcus Cor Von in that spot?
“SmackDown!” nearly topped their mind-blowing selection of Torrie Wilson when they managed to pick up Hardcore Holly. Wow. They lose The Hooliganz, Chris Benoit, Ken Kennedy, Booker, Boogeyman and so many others...and they score Bob Holly. Welcome to Friday Night Wasteland.
The Miz was moved to ECW, leaving many people asking, “Why the fuck does the Miz still have a job?” Val Venis and Harry Smith aren’t on TV, but The Miz is being moved around in the draft to try and score himself some more air time? Pathetic. Did the Cruiserweight title get shipped to “Raw”? Nope. Is Muhammad Hassan making a comeback? Nope. Is the Great Khali still on the flagship show and in need of a manager? Nope. Does putting Davairi on “Raw” make a damn bit of sense? Nope.The Majors were sent to “SmackDown!”. Marks everywhere could be heard uttering at their computer screens..."Who are the Major Brothers?"
William Regal left the show that had actually been utilizing him properly to go back to a show where all he ever did was cheezy backstage skits with Japanese wrestlers and guys pretending to be handicapped. Speaking of which...Eugene and his new heat-seeking gear are going to “SmackDown!”.
Victoria and Jillian switched shows. I understand the desire to put Jillian near the Women’s belt...but HOW ABOUT Michelle McCool? There’s a girl with way more sex appeal and potential. Why would you take the best female worker in the company and ship her off to Friday nights? I have a feeling the words: “The WWE would like to wish Lisa Marie all the best in her future endeavors” aren’t far off.
The final pick was Johnny Nitro going to ECW – which actually makes sense to me. I think I’d prefer him on “SmackDown!”, but on ECW he has the opportunity to become a big time player. Finally being seperated from Melina might actually be good for him. How long before Edge bangs her too?There was an awful lot of shuffling deck chairs, that at the end of the day doesn’t amount to fuck all. Miz? Eugene? Holly? Vis? Daivari? Like...who cares? Does anyone think for a second that any of these guys are in line for some kind of a push on their new show? I hope you’re not that naive.
Oh and one final stupid thing...did ECW get fined for tampering or something? Are they the Minnesota Timberwolves of wrestling? Why did they only get three draft picks while "Raw" and "SmackDown!" had five? Not to mention, "Raw" picked up SIX new dudes since they got a 2 for 1 special on the former tag champs. Just further evidence that the now deceased chairman only gives a flying fuck about "Raw".
13 comments: on "Supplemental Stupidity"
Good article...decent draft, some dumb ass decisions.
The only real reason they held this draft was because they needed new guys for Cena to bury. Vince, you are killing your company.
This draft was the stupidest idea McMahon had in a long time. He killed two shows, and is about to kill countless characters. All because he thinks somehow it will make us like Cena. Yeah, fuck you, old man.
Now that TNA is (supposedly) turning a profit, why not try pulling your head out of your ass for once?
Now we know who killed Vince. From the WSX myspace page(who else had forgotten they existed?) This is also funny, cause Banderos is supposed to be Jim Mitchell's new monster
From the desk of Fabian Kaelin...
As of today, Fathers Day Sunday June 17, 2007, Ricky Banderas, the Wrestling Society X Champion has been stripped of the Championship due to unsportsmanlike activities unbecoming to a champion.
Early last week, Mr. Banderas was held by police in Wilkes-Barre, PA and is a "person of interest" in the limousine explosion which may or may not have killed Dr. Vincent Kennedy McMahon, Chairman of the World Wrestling Entertainment. Banderas was apprehended after a long struggle involving several chokeslams, and illegal fireballs, subjected to five hours of questioning in which three translators were called in, along with a criminologist who swore Banderas was speaking his an unknown dialect which required close captioning to understand.
Detective Colin MacNiff of the Wilkes-Barre Special Crimes Pro-Wrestling division remarked upon releasing Ricky Banderas from custody due to lack of evidence and comprehension "Mr. Banderas has some priors involving fire and pro wrestling. Hell, he won the WSX title by rigging a coffin with explosives. Even so, what part do explosions play in the wonderful world of pro wrestling? Can someone please explain to me why so many tax dollars are wasted on fruitless pro wrestling investigations?"
Wrestling Society X wishes Ricky Banderas all the best in his future endeavors. We have sent a delicious Hickory Farms summer sausage gift basket to his hospital room in Mexico City as he's is recuperating nicely after his long awaited plastic surgery for his horrific burns courtesy of Vamprio and waiting for the heat to die down.
Details involving the future of the WSX Championship and Wrestling Society X are forthcoming.
London & Kendrick leaving Smackdown effectively takes two established cruiserweights off the brand, as well as the most established tag team. This may make sense for them to take the place of the Hardys and feud with Cade and Murdoch, but it really just destroys Smackdown's tag division. Yes, the Major Brothers move there, and now Smackdown has two, count them, two tag teams to feud over the tag belts. Whoopdee doo.
How long until Edge has sex with Mickie James? The real question is how long until Edge has sex with Kenny Dykstra... Dykstra is the one now on Smackdown.
Sandman moving to Raw seems to say that WWE finds him as being the most valuable of the ECW orignals. I have no idea why.
WWE always tries to make us think Bob Holly is important, but luckily, we the fans are the ones who really decide. I don't care what injuries he's had, how nice his dropkick is, or how legit tough he is, I wish they'd just fire this guy already. No one cared about him on Smackdown before, and he's not good enough to get TV time on Raw. He's boring.
I wish Hassan was making a comeback. Instead, Daivari will be come a less than controversal jobber.
Victoria leaving Raw really pisses me off. There is nothing for her but gimmick sex matches on Smackdown, and she won't get over doing that stuff. She never has. I hope this isn't them leading to her release. WWE women do not have a long shelf life usually.
The whole draft was a huge dissapointment which will leave more superstars languishing because creative has nothing for them...
Hopefully WWE can pull off some "trades" and undo all this stuff during the next week.
lol those edge comments are funny because they are true.excuse me hilary duff is on tv mute button. ok much better damn she looks good looking,see this is more interesting then the shit they put on other then vinces death. now smackdown is going to be worse the destination x
Finally, The Hooliganz (I guess that is their O Show given name) get to go to the flagship program... this is a good thing
Jillian Hall going to Raw is ok, but why take Victoria? Put the pretty talentless chics on one show and the actual wrestling chics on the other (with the belt)
Nitro and Miz to ECW is fine... Punk and Nitro had a dope match a few months back... so we have that match-up to look forward to.... I assume ECW received fewer drafts since its only a one hour program
Hope Dykstra doesn't get lost on SD... The Majors had no place on ECW so their move is understandable... while Daivari's move is a mystery
Sandman to Raw could be dope... He could go over or just flop... There was no reason to move Holly or acquire Viscera
Splitting Regal and Taylor was a dumb fucking move... why breakup great tag teams before they get a fair run? Hey now Taylor can tag with Eugene
talk about a clusterfuck this "draft" turned out to be
I am just thinking about losing Victoria matches and getting Jillian Hall doing her dumb Britney Spears/Brooke Hogan schtick every Monday on Raw. Gross.
Despite the fact that Raw made out better than every other brand in the draft, I think that it has actually become more unwatchable. The only actual draft picks I am excited about are King Booker and Mr. Kennedy, and both are hurt.
Tonight on Raw:
Vanilla Bobby Lashley destroys Daivari.
Jillian Hall does a segment.
Umaga destroys the Sandman.
Cena, Booker, and Foley cut promos about the big title match.
and an hour and a half of Vince McMahon is dead bullshit.
It is not unfathomable to me that in the wake of Vince McMahon's "death", he is attempting to make every show as bad as possible, so that fans will credit everything good in the WWE to his genius and clamor for his ressurection.
Yes, I said ressurection, because I believe he is the type of egomaniacal dickbag that would have himself rise from the dead and become a false god.
You are right Tim, remember he is the egomaniacal that has already both challenged God and called himself the higher power.
One brilliant thing this Draft has allowed us is the Fatal Four Way for the ECW Championship at Vengeance.
Chris Benoit vs. C.M. Punk vs. Elijah Burke vs. Marcus Cor Von
Nobody loses, whoever wins will be decent with the title, although 3 of the four could be excellent(I'll let you guess) A feud between any of these two could also be quite interesting. Shit has already gotten better since Vince died.
Tim what u said was extermely funny!!!
i just thought of something with the very little star talent maybe they are gonna bring cabana into smackdown which would rule
buryme, I'm a Cabana mark too, but please, get it through your head, it will be a while before Cabana is a TV guy.
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