WARNING: The following article contains language that is F'n Frank Fronte-like in nature. It does not necessarily reflect the views of the entire staff at Tha O Show, its sponsors or affiliates. Mother fuckin' reader discretion is advised!!Fuck Vince McMahon! Fuck last night's "Raw"! And most definitely, without a doubt, Fuck John Cena with a mother fuckin' spiked bat!!
What a piece of horseshit last night's edition of "Raw" was!! Where do I even begin? Let's work backwards, shall we? John Cena made Chris Benoit tap! Did you read that people?? Cena made BENOIT tap! Who the fuck booked that shit?!?!
Seriously...is there no way to put over a certain character without completely burying others? Why was Chris Benoit's presence on "Raw" necessary in order to further the ongoing storyline between Shawn Michaels and John Cena? Why did Benoit - arguably the best pure pro wrestler in WWE - lose cleanly to Cena by tapping out like a bargain basement jobber?
Last night's finish to "Raw" was plain and simple unacceptable for any true fan of WRESTLING. Enough is enough. The bullshit has to stop.
The finish not only further destroys the 'character' that is Chris Benoit, The Rabid Wolverine, but diminishes the U.S. Title as well. How special will THAT title match be at Mania now that it has been made official that its current holder is no contest to the WWE Champion? Why wasn't there an MVP run-in last night? At least! Why couldn't THAT story have been furthered while WWE continues to play up the 'who's gonna turn on his partner first?' story going on with HBK and Cena?
They have now officially buried both the tag-team division on "Raw" AND key members of the "SmackDown!" roster. The payoff better be worth it...anything short of a title change will completely soil an already abhorrent angle.
And here's the kicker! It's not even the worst angle currently existing as we head into WrestleMania! The Battle of the Billionaires took yet another unnecessary talent-burying twist last night. Umaga squashes Eugene - like we all didn't see that coming...and Vince shaves the mentally-challenged competitor's hair. Compelling.Bobby Lashley - of all people - now gets to hold the distinction of being the official first person to ever break Chris Masters' Masterlock. Any push (like there was one anyway) for Masters is now dead. And Lashley's character has been developed how? He's an unstoppable force right?
Wrong! Vince McMahon apparently is so unimpressed with our fair Lindsay, that he's challenging him to a match next week on "Raw" himself! Now, if Vince is so confident that he can defeat Lashley in a one on one bout, why the fuck does he even need Umaga to represent him at Mania? Something tells me that Vince has something up his proverbial sleeve...as usual...but the booking of this upcoming match, like everything else last night, made no sense.
How dumb do we at Tha O Show look now for giving an O to the idea of JBL re-entering the ring to compete? We should have known that JBL's in-ring return (if it ever happens) would have to be presented with more fanfare (as mentioned in his show opening promo).
At least JBL's appearance was a highlight of last night's debacle of an episode. JBL could teach a seminar on how to cut a promo. He remains one of the best on the current WWE roster. I found it interesting that he took Cena's side, so to speak, by telling Shawn Michaels that Cena would defeat him at WM23. Perhaps this was foreshadowing Cena's heel turn.The Battle Royal was a waste of time. A casual wrestling fan of just a couple of months and only a few years in age could have booked that match! If Edge loses, he's out of the Money In The Bank match at WrestleMania 23. So...he fakes an injury, escapes under the bottom rope until only one competitor is left, re-enters the ring, eliminates said competitor and retains his spot in the big Mania match. Like we haven't seen that before dozens of times. How suspenseful and creative.
The match COULD have helped create other storylines for Mania...but by this time it seems clear that the big event is probably totally booked. That means the World Tag Team Titles, the WWE Tag Team Titles, the Intercontinental Title, the ECW World Title and the WWE Cruiseweight Title are all NOT on the line at the biggest show of the year. It's possible this could change...but there will obviously be no big build-up for any of these matches.Of course, time must still be devoted to the 'classic' waiting-to-happen in Lashley/Umaga. Ugh.
One other highlight (and I'm stretching here considering what a bad show it was) was HBK showing Batista how to work a mic during commentary. Todd Grisham comes out to replace the injured Jerry Lawler (what the hell was The King doing anyway...by attacking The Great Khali? Women get busted up in the ring all the time and he just sits there...he decides to intervene now? Why?).
Anyway, Grisham asks Michaels if he wants Cena to win the match against Benoit to which HBK responds "Shut up Grisham". Very simple...but entertaining. The no-personality-having Batista would have likely froze on the spot.
Anyway...in keeping with my current mood, opinion of last night's show, overall feeling with the main event picture headed into Mania and the disclaimer at the top of this article...allow me to finish off by saying...
FUCK!
Oh yeah, here are Tha O League stadings after week 8. Looks like Plunkett is running away with it! Will Tha O Show staff member become the new champ?
1 Tha Hitman - 2002 pts
2 Dan-e-o loves Cena - 1886 pts
3 Goatbusters - 1868 pts
4 Team_Rated_RKO - 1837 pts
5 Smashin' Masters 2K7 - 1817 pts
6 Methods Of Mayhem - 1813 pts
7 Team Boudreau - 1802 pts
8 TheEndustry - 1798 pts
9 The O Noes! - 1776 pts
10 wrestling4life - 1673 pts
11 Kelly's Killers - 1575 pts
12 Sketch - 1504 pts
13 Rizo's Roster - 1497 pts
14 BigDaddyDonnie - 1486 pts
15 Dan-e-o - 1486 pts
16 D-Generation Next - 1451 pts
17 The Kickassters - 1402 pts
18 Rapsfan - 1390 pts
19 Metal Gods - 1378 pts
20 I love ThaOShow.Com - 1147 pts
21 JorJorBynks - 1040 pts
22 Illinois' Finest - 948 pts
31 comments: on "Tha F@#*%n' Raw Report"
lol u make me laugh dan-e-o.. and this time it wasnt cause of your damn hyena laugh
i didnt realli watch the match but yea cena make chris tap is bullshit
i actually felt bad for eugene...i was all ...awwwww
for once lashly pissed me off...the only thing hes realli realli good at is slappin people
i also missed the JBL thing i was occupied with other things when that happened
lol that part where king went in and whats his name is still doing commentary pissed me of...he goes in the ring gets killed...commentary: I think my college just sacrficed himself ....*rolls eyes* ya think?
and again i say u amuse me
OMG GARBAGE!!!!!
This show was the worse show I have seen in such a long time! (and that saying a lot)
Time after time why do we have to have Lashley, Umaga and McMahon shoved down our mouths. Like I am so fucken fed up with this that it has brought me to the point where I don't want to watch Wrestlemania any more because I know that it's going to make me literally sick when I see Lashley and Umaga go on last at Mania.
Like why does Umaga and Lashley have to be on every show. Like you see them on Raw then on EcW and then on Smackdown like give me a break.
Like seriously knowning the way this match is going to go, that Umaga losing to make McMahon shave his head makes me want to have the stip changed to who ever loses get there head blown clean off.
And I agree how the fuck does Benoit tapping to Cena put anyone over. Like seriously how are you building your company by shiting on ur #1 wrestler to put over a main event at Wrestlemania whie the Shawn Michaels sits at ring side doing colour. And then once again for the 20th time they tease a heel turn, am I the only one that wishes week after week that Michaels kicks Cena's head off and finally turns Fucken heel! Its about time!
And then JBL apperance on RAW like why? what did it do... Don't get me wrong JBL is amazing but they could have used them so much better then just to get in the ring and get his chin kicked in by Michaels.
Let me ask this how are you developing the Main Event at Wrestlemania (thats if it is actually the main even becasue by the looks of it its going to be second to the battle of the billionaries lmao) by having your two main eventers fight other people with no connection at all and both of them domainating them, and not have anytype of run in or anything like that. Seriously.
And then the Eugene angle, I taught it was o.k now that took a lot for me to say that but I say it because IT COULD HAVE LED TO SOMETHING ELSE. Not only could they have shaven someones head to put over the match at wrestlemania, but then Eugene after getting his head shaved could end up turning Psycho and becoming an actually wrestler instead of a jobber.
Like can you picture this Eugene get his head shaved and the goes to the back and looks at the mirror he notices that his hair his gone and that he had just been screwed he can then start banging his head against the mirrior going into a rage, then u can build him going out and wrestling and destorying his compention. But no what they do is show him in the back crying his eyes out which makes me feel like i feel bad because of them attacking a mental challenge person :S
This RAW has got me completely pissed off about WRestling if they cant change it by next Raw they might be losing out on my 50 some odd dollars, and I am pretty sure it wont just be me either!!
Thats my Rant!!!
Peace Brother!
Damn, makes me feel kinda good that I missed that episode of Raw.
But I was thinking,before the "Battle Of The Billionaires" *snicker* epic maybe they should have John Cena have a rap battle against Mos Def and, wait for it, Cena wins!!! And MiTB, let's turn it into a HiTC/cage/casket/buried alive/super duper ULTIMATE E(you know instead of the X)pink-slip-on-a-pole/evening gown match!!!! And the only choice for the winner in this match, David Arquette...AND K-FED!!!!
I'm gonna go hang myself now
-Vince
And I was just reading it and I forgot to add how horrible what they did with this money in the bank match!
First they take out Edge and then put him in the Battle Royal you can quote J.R saying "Mr.McMahon hasn't been impressed has of late with Edge's performance, this is why he has had his MITB spot taken from him."
First of all this is a totally insult towards Edge, why out of all people in MITB does he have to fight again for his spot and if they really wanted to fill a spot on Raw, why couldnt they do something to at lease explain why they took his spot away instead of them just saying that Edge hasn't been performing as of late which is bullshit but we all know that it is a story line.
So why do this story line in the first place just to have Edge win the match again :S
Just plain stupidity, that all I have to say about this Fucked up RAW.
Thats my Rant!
Peace Brother!
I'm surprised that they did that angle with Edge last night; I'd have figured with him being injured at the moment (which is why he hasn't been wrestling lately, for those who didn't know), they wouldn't have done something like this. Edge now would be the clear favorite to win Money In The Bank if not for the fact that Orton is also in it. Their role in the match will simply springboard a split of "Rated TKO" (go fuck yourself, Grisham) and lead to their inevitable feud.
How many more guys is McMahon going to bury en route to WrestleMania?
The JBL promo was gold, but I sure as hell felt stupid when he came out in a suit instead of wrestling attire. I knew he was getting his head kicked off either way though. Cena burying Benoit was bullshit, and I was hoping so badly that Cena was going to F-U Michaels after the match. Dude needs to turn heel.
The first tale of the tape between McMahon and Trump was gold. The second one was pretty good, but not as good as the first one. Stratus doesn't need to get her legacy buried by having that McMahon angle brought up.
Yeah, RAW sucked last night. In regards to McMahon, I paraphrase/quote New Jack-"If his dick's long enough, he can go fuck himself."
considering i haven't updated my O League roster in a month -- i expected plunkett to run away with it.
Screw you all. (kayfabe) I'm going to end up choking so bad if you guys keep putting me over.
yeah your completely right. Benoit tapping out to the wwe champ and a huge star in the industry KILLS Benoit. How will he ever recover? He's dead and useless. Whats the point of keeping the man employed? Now he's nothing and nobody. And the US title was such a coveted commodity, but who would want it now that its holder lost to the champion of the company? His legacy is forever tainted......because he lost a match cleanly.....RIP Chris Benoit.
And your also quite correct to be writting the professional obituary for christ masters as well. His character is dead as well cause his masterlock was broken....and he was on the fast track to the top with the masterlock challenge. But now that its broken the only thing he can do now to get over is to have wrestling matches...truely the end of an era.
Now all sarcasm aside, didnt you see cena beating benoit coming? the champion cant lose momentum going into wrestlemania. And do you really think that loss hurts chris benoit in the least? He's a very established veteran who just lost to the champion, people will forget about it. Ans the US title looking bad doesnt matter at this point because we all know benoits going to lose it at wrestlemania so a newer and fresher person will make the belt interesting again.
i think the masterlock being broken is possibly the best thing to ever happen to chris masters. He can now win matches and titles instead of just putting one move on people every monday night. The breaking of the masterlock might make the move seem less weak, but finishers have been broken and survived before and they havent lost their effectiveness.
And the reason the battle of the billionares match is so promoted isnt because vince mcmahons in it, but because a celebrity is in it. Name on wrestlemania that had a celebrity in an angle that wasnt, in some way or another, involved in the main part of the show. Its just away to bring in newer viewers and get some media attention, which is like free advertising. I know you dont like the match because it features two home grown wwe wrestlers who arent the greatest caliber wrestlers, but their not the worst. And I think they should have a big match like this to showcase what they can really do in a big match enviroment and change the minds of skeptical people like you guys. As someone whos actually going to be attending wrestlemania, I actually think it will turn out pretty good. It might not be the best wrestlemania ever? But it has the possibility to be a really really good one.
On a last note, I think this idea of war on smarks vince mcmahon has declared by not making things turn out the way you have them is a little beyond reality. The idea that he makes the decisions he does is based on ways to bury wrestlers liked by smarks or the idea that he takes any opportunity to stick it to smarks, shows a definite egocentrism on your guys' part. The man is just trying to run a promotion. You dont have to always agree with his decisions (lord knows i dont alot) but dont take it as such an offense. To be fair I know you didnt necessarily say any of that directly. Except that comment about the "true fan of WRESTLING" (as if all true fans share your opinions). But any smark column is loaded with this "persecution of smarks" mentality. Quite frankly, its a very unrealistic outlook to have.
Fuck you anonymous. Write down a fuckin name.
As for RAW, what a load of predictable crap.
Saw the superkick coming, Eugene vs. Umaga, Edge faking an injury only to jump in at the last minute to win it, although I didn't expect "the man" to fuck up something so simple as a toss out. Fuck you Flair, retire already.
Hey Vince, if I want to see women get naked, I'll pop in Debbie does Dallas again. When I watch your show( as we are so graciously reminded everytime we watch) I wanna see wrestling.
On a final note, Fuck Cena and Fuck Grisham.
Um, is Edge hurt?
He's cut promos for weeks to get out of matches and this week he barely worked.
Or is he layin low cuz of this whole steroid scandal exploding in his face?
Jaw injury from what I've heard. They're keeping him on TV in a non-wrestling role because they still want to have him involved in Money In The Bank.
Whoever anonymous is, for the love of God, just put in a motherfucking kayfabe name. You're not going to get any more heat than you already have on you.
Smarks are critical of the business because we want to be ENTERTAINED, instead of watching some guy who got stuck with a lame gimmick intended for children or some 'roided up gasbag who can't cut a promo if his life depended on it. And since the latter is the current state of the business in WWE, of course we're going to not enjoy the product. We like wrestling, and hate it when guys who don't have what it takes to carry the company are the guys who are called on to do so.
If you were watching SpongeBob (as I'm sure a retarded mark like you does) and his voice was done by a drug-dealing biker, you probably would say the product sucks and he shouldn't be playing the role he does. With that in mind, please clue me in as to why it makes any fucking bit of a goddamn difference if we're talking about wrestling instead?
By the way, anybody else notice that this guy showed up right around the time that Haught disappeared?
Jaw injury is what I've heard too. Fuck the steroid scandal...its a SCANDAL. Ortons name was mentioned too, so he'd probably lay low. So would Angle, but the name that surprised me the most was Shane Helms.
I have nothing to say about last nights RAW almost everyone has summed it up for me. Like even ratedrstar86 like did to. Like please dont type like to like begin a thought.
MOTHER FUCK, The MOTHERFUCKER who booked that motherfucker.
I will say though, what kind of clusterfuck bullshit will end the show next week?
Raw was highly predictable. I half expected to come here today and read more praise for how brilliant Edge is at portraying his character as a cowardly heel when in fact he's been about as vanilla as the rest of the guys you folks love to hate. You all sound surprised that Cena would go over Benoit, that Lashley would break the Masterlock (hopefully that angle is now dead), that Vince would dominate TV all before the big match. Heck, I wasn't even surprised when Khali came out to attack Ashley in an attempt to get him some cheap heat (and judging by the deafening indifference in the arena, I don't think it worked). Biggest disappoinment? No new Hall of Fame inductee announced. The Cena/Michaels angle is bad and I hope they vacate the tag titles after Wrestlemania. I was only able to sit through the Umaga debacle because I was only half paying attention while doing some work. I will be interested to see how Vince punishes him for costing him his hair, though. Meanwhile, I'll just be crossing my fingers for the rumored Y2J return.
fallenone: debbie does dallas? how can you watch that old bushy crap... and whats this "if i want to see naked women"?... when do you not want to see naked women?
I tivo'ed raw... so i cant critique it yet...
Whoever said "fuck flair"... ill hunt you down and chop you until you cry
I actually puked in my mouth a little bit when Cena made Benoit tap.
Fuck Flair. He was great back when. But he's shit now. Entrance, Whoo, Chop (10x), Back body drop onto the hip = a Flair match for the last five fuckin years. So I'll say it again, fuck Flair. Retire and enjoy whatever bit of life is left for you.
Hey Brian Plunkett,
Fuck you.
Sincerely Yours,
Ouch.
Okay, it wasn't you, Tim. I thought it might have been simply because that anonymous asshat did write his articles fairly well (even though they were a load of shit), and you had gotten kinda quiet right around the time that mark showed up.
Sorry about blaming you. Wasn't anything personal.
Anybody else notice that suddenly we all say "fuck" a lot ever since Fronte's Orton rant?
FallenOne: dont tell me the man's routine... i know it by heart... its classic... you dont deserve to watch flair... go beat off to a bunch of "spot-monkeys"
I think after the New Jack interview the word "FUCK" has grown to be synonymous with this site and tha o-sters.
FUCK
I'm gonna Photoshop the site's logo so that it reads "Tha Fucking O Show".
I noticed that, in addition to the constant use of the word fuck, we also use an abnormal amount of "sexual excitement (usually masturbating) over wrestling" references for a site whose O-sters are primarily straight guys. Especially considering that none of us have probably ever beat off over wrestling.
Except for maybe Fronte; he seems to get pretty excited over wrestling.
Ok Ok...
I'm putting a 24 hour ban on the word fuck!
Garbage, garbage, garbage. I almost want to be too busy to watch WWE. I m starting to long for the days of WCW. Wheres the shock value?? Why the hell did a 7 foot monster come to the ring and grab a little girl? Where was Kane? What purpose did Khalil serve. We spent 2 minutes watching this guy walk up the ramp. No match - Vince is in trouble. Name one valid superstar in WWE - who is a good wrestler and can sell and whose name is not the Undertaker because other than Taker WWE hase no one - no Rock, Stone Cold, Hogan, Angle, JBL, HHH, nobody that has superstar talent and can carry the ball - Jonh Cena? Come on what a joke - and dont get me started on Jamal - um i mean -
Umpuka (Umaga) -its a sad day when it looks like Wrestlemania s gonna be bust.
Shawn Michaels can sell. Edge can sell. King Booker can sell. Finlay, Benoit, Flair, Triple H (when he returns), Kennedy, Regal.
All of them can wrestle. All of them can sell. Most of them already are main eventers. They all deserve to be though. But yes, as it stands, all three champions don't sell. Lashley used to sell decently during his SmackDown! run following his loss to JBL at No Way Out 2006, but now that McMahon is using ECW as a means to push him through the roof, he won't sell either.
I'm still excited about WrestleMania to an extent. Taker winning the title, Michaels hopefully winning the title, Austin stunning McMahon one more time, and Money In The Bank all make this event worth what I'm paying for it. Although, to be fair, it's not costing me a dime since I'm going to my friend's house to watch it.
Great, I had to open my big mouth, and now I got a ban placed on one of the o-sters favorite words. Steven Richards is my homeboy, apparently.
Yea look on the bright side of wrestlemania. Nope - lets be seious - the current WWE roster is poor at best- 98% of the wraslers suck - Shawn Michaels, Lashley, Umaga, Khalil, Cena, Kennedy, Booker T, Benoit, the list goes on. Id rather watch Wrestlemania 3 - dont expect too many surprises - why not ? Cuz Vince McMahon could give a shit about entertaining us - he know we gonna buy it no matter how shitty it is - why? Because we have no choice - its either WWE or WWE - TNA is like watching a local wrestling show in a small town - wack - even tho they try .But how far can they really get without the NWA titles now - The current state of wrestling is a disgrace to every talented wrestler who built up the business. No choices - keep eating the fastfood wrestliong were fed. Yummy ! Puke puke.
You killed your whole argument by saying Shawn Michaels sucks.
You can stop talking now.
Seriously though, how is watching a Flair match these days an honor???
Mind you I know every wrestler has a set routine in the ring, but when that routine consists of a word, a strut, some chops, a failed attempt at a turnbuckle spot and a back body drop, where does that leave the action?
I don't like spot monkeys either JBrown. I like the psychology, which is nowhere near the ring when Flair is.
Dude, ok, if Donnie hadn't banned the word that would describe what you are with mother in front of it and idiot behind it, I'd let you have it. Do you know what wrestling is? Do you know what it takes to put on a match? For that matter do you know how to put on your pants in the morning without zipping up whatever you have hanging? Gordo AKA Chase, you SUCK. Take that to the bank, bitch.
woah whats with all the hostility here? We may love wrestling, but its nothing to have a stroke over. damn people.
Where do I start with the absolute piece of shit that was RAW last night?
I know...I changed the channel back to ABC to see if Heather Mills' prosthetic leg would fall off during the "Dancing With the Stars" premier. The rest of the time, I was too busy cursing myself for lending a friend of mine the new Raven & Honky Tonk Man shoot video cause I was left with nothing to watch until 10pm.
Having Cena make Benoit tap is about the equivalent of a Tim Sylvia fan thinking he can beat Fedor Emelianenko, if not worse.
While i'm on about Pride just this little bit...how fucking bad is it that your (Pride FC) top star and middleweight champion Wanderlei Silva lost to the welterweight champion, Dan Henderson? Not only does in lessen the value of Wandy, it also tarnishes the value somewhat of the middlweight title, and it greatly tarnishes Pride's exposure to it's stateside fans. Like UFC pres Dana White said...
"That was fucking retarded"
Oh yeah, it also makes Wandy look like the same Wandy that both Tito Ortiz and Vitor Belfort steamrolled.
Anyways, the JBL bit on the mic was about the only good thin....was the only good thing to come out of RAW...it's too bad Shawn "I had a bump on my head" Michaels cut it short. With that said, JBL is still gold on the mic and is a far better champion than Batista and Cena combined. Brian Pillman was famous for saying, "Anybody can get the fans to cheer for them. The tough part is getting the same fans to hate you", and JBL did just that. Aside from Eddie Guerrero & Edge, he was probably the best champion the WWE has had in a damn long time.
Yeah, I know Dan-E-O is gonna say something about me not putting King "Bookah" in that list, but then again how hard is it exactly to act Irish/Scottish/English? *points towards the Highlanders*
Just when I thought WWE was digging themselves out of the hole the put themselves in with the year that was 2006 by starting to have good shows with Smackdown and the rare ECW show, they quickly put themselves back in it...thank god for old tapes of New Japan, All Japan, and Zero-One to remind what wrestling should be like.
All in all. It sucks. It sucks to be a wrestling fan right now and this has to be the lowest expectation i've had for a Wrestlemania, and not just because it's on April Fool's. But it can't be any worse than last year's.
Can it?
Post a Comment