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2.07.2007

Extremely Subpar

I have only watched ECW a handful of times since its rebirth on SciFi. However, every time I watch, it seems that I forget just how lousy it is. Last night was no exception.

As if McMahon's fingerprints aren't already dug deep into the throat of the legacy that is ECW, last night he tightened his grip by making another appearance on the show.

The show began with Balls Mahoney, RVD, Tommy Dreamer, Sabu and Sandman in the ring and featured what McMahon probably believed to be a "shoot" on the ECW originals, referring to them as "unathletic , never-have-beens" who couldn't make it in WWE or WCW.

He then stated that almost all of the originals in the ring had criminal backgrounds. He then stated that they were all going to be putting them in matches against the "new breed".

Didn't WCW try this angle in 2000, with very unsuccessful results?

Anyways, as if the opening segment wasn't bad enough, the icing on the promo cake was Hardcore Holly's interview backstage prior to his match with Bobby Lashley. Watching him somehow reminded me of watching Forrest Gump. I was almost hoping to hear him end the promo with "That's all I have to say about that." It would have been the most entertaining thing I've ever heard on a WWECW promo.

As for the Sparkplug/Blackberg match, it was every bit as disappointing as a midcard match featuring Lashley should be. After the match, Gene Snitsky finally made his long-rumored ECW debut, sans long hair and goatee, attacking the champion. Oh, boy, a Gene Snitsky/Bobby Lashley feud. Just what we always wanted! Did someone say "WrestleMania"?

Getting back to the originals: last night might as well have been called Matt Striker night. He was a lame throw-in for every original VS. new breed match, first as a referee, then as the special timekeeper, then as the guest announcer. What was the point of this? Is Striker due for a push? Or, much like most of WWECW, was this something that was done despite being completely pointless?

Speaking of pointless, I realize that most of ECW's following consists of single guys, but why do they continue to have that stupid "Extreme Expose" segment every week? If you're in that bad of need to give these girls something to do, teach them to wrestle, move them to "Raw", and have them challenging for the women's title. Women actually wrestling for a title? What a crazy idea. ECW is only an hour long; there is no need to waste part of that hour watching Kelly dance.

I digress. Monty Brown...er, I mean Marcus Cor Von was, at least, a little bit entertaining on commentary. Certainly better than Tazz. One night after Lawler dropped several commentating gems, Tazz followed suit last night. Here's my favorite -"What's the bell ringing for? It's not the end of the match!" Wow. Thanks for letting us know that they ring the bell at the end of the match. We had no idea. Especially after the Cor Von/Mahoney match, when they showed a close-up of Striker ringing the bell for about a minute and a half following Mahoney tapping out.

ECW is becoming worse by the week. As recently as last week, I was curious as to why nobody wanted to write about ECW. Silly me. Last night proved why. I can't believe I missed Wrestle Society X for this.


9 comments: on "Extremely Subpar"

Ben Boudreau said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ben Boudreau said...

I disagree. I actually like where this storyline is heading. At least the ECW brand is heading in a particular direction rather than stagnation.

McMahon has been rumored to dislike the ECW originals so it might as well manifest itself on television. I also kinda agree with Cor Von's assessment of RVD. He was innovative at one time, but he is no longer. He's an amazingly talented performer, but he does have limits. It's 2007.

I like the new breed. Cor Von, Thorn, and Burke are all great and potential future main eventers. This also casts guys like Sabu and Sandman in the top spots on weekly ECW programming.

The only think I didn't like was the Snitsky debut. When I saw the Snitsky promo, I marked out. He looks brutal now. Then they decided to bring him out the same night! They gave Shannon Moore months of hype but less than 30 minutes for Snitsky? They dropped the ball on that for sure.

He attacks the ECW champion but them double teams him with Holly. I totally expected him to attack Holly as well, putting himself over as a monster heel. Again I was disapointed. Overall, however, I thought ECW was a solid show this week.

The Hitman said...

That's actually a pretty good point. I guess something is better than nothing, which is what they were doing in ECW for months. I'm pessimistic that this storyline will play out, though, as reports are saying that the only reason ECW is still around is because of contractual obligations to SciFi, so it's solely going to be used as a breeding ground for Bobby Lashley.

I also agree with you that Van Dam is no longer innovative, but I also believe that he is still a very good performer and is entertaining, and his own stupidity will be his downfall, rather than him no longer being able to put on a good show.

Cor Von and Burke are both excellent athletes with a tremendous amount of charisma and skills on the stick. Monty Brown's promos with Christian Cage in the twilight of his TNA tenure were gold; I have every reason to believe he can do it again in the E.

Hardcore Holly has become ECW's permanent lickspittle. Is it just me, or does it seem like they have paired him off as the flunky of each top heel in ECW?

Snitsky's new look doesn't look good. He looks too much like Kane, honestly. If they're trying to permanently erase the "It wasn't my fault!" thing from the fans' minds, having him resemble the guy he feuded with in that storyline probably doesn't help.

Signguy_shooter said...

I think this new angle between the "ECW Originals " and the "New Breed" is a good idea, ECW kind of lost direction after Big Show and Heyman left . I also like it cause two of the non-originals I do like Bruke and Cor Von are in the angle. I would like to see them have an elimination match between the two factions at WM 23 cause it gives the "Originals" a chance to be on a WM ppv.
I would also like to have them bring CM Punk into the angle. They could make it look like he is going to side with the "New Breed" but turns on them and joins up with the "Originals".
The one thing bad though this is almost like a "shoot" angle when it comes to the "Originals" after, WM 23 there might be none of them left especially when RVD leaves once his contreact is up.

Signguy_shooter said...

I forgot one more thing. I think Snitsky looks like the love child of Brock Lesnar and Goldberg,lol.

Metal God Capt. said...

This was actually one of the better ECW broadcasts in recent memory. At least the Originals lot to viable contenders and not the midcard rejects. Plus that whole theme was strung together perfectly throughout the night, capped off with "it's not over" mini-melee at the end. Now all we need is a more charismatic champion and some new guys that don't have that clinched-teeth huff-and-puff look (apparently the writers think thats all it takes to look extreme).

Frank Fronte said...

I amazed watching ECW how much TNA missed the boat on Monty.

Snitsky is the ugliest bastard i have ever seen.
He looks like he has a disease. He has turned into a decent working big man, but he is so weird looking.

Frank Fronte said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Hitman said...

He is weird looking. They actually have an article about it on wwe.com.

When asked for comment about his grotesque new appearance, he replied "It wasn't my fault!"

Seriously, though. If the idea was to make him look like "extreme", they missed the boat. His new look reminds me of Bald Bull from Nintendo's "Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!" game. How many flights do you have to fall down to get that ugly?