ECW Recap

No opening video or recap of anything last week - it's straight from "The entire world is watchin'" to the DON'T QUESTION MY HEART music. Mathews and Striker welcome us to ECW where tonight we'll have a six-man tag of Swagger and the Hart Dynasty versus Finlay, Christian and Dreamer. Christian Cage's music opens the show. My opening thoughts as I watch this are just how saavy a political player he's turned out to be in the wrestling world.

He got as hot as he could in WWE, left when they wouldn't push him, and walked into TNA tailor made for a title run. He turned around and did the same thing in TNA and walked into WWE primed to take over ECW. You have to give Cage his due.

He cuts an opening show promo about people who still think they're famous when a reality show is over only to really be "a dork who won't go away" and of course he's talking about Jack Swagger. He says he's sick and tired of Swagger's crap after he screwed up the match on Superstars last week and tonight he's going to do something about it, so he demands Swagger come out RIGHT NOW.

After no-selling this for about 30 seconds Jack Swagger finally hits the top of the ramp. "My fame, is running out? You, are gonna tell ME, that my time is running out? I'm a two-time, two-time All-American. My time is just beginning. Your time as ECW Champion is running out. Since you cheated, twice, the justice I've been talking for has finally been served. I've been granted an ECW title match at Extreme Rules." Cage asks if the EXTREME stip will be an "I already beat this dork twice" match. Swagger says it will be a "I return to my rightful glory" match or something like that. While the two argue Tiffany's music interrupts.

"Before you start talking about the match, you really need to get the facts straight Jack. While you do have an opportunity at an ECW title, what you did on Superstars hasn't gone unnoticed. Therefore your match won't be one-on-one, it will be a triple thread. Allow me to introduce you both to your opponent." Tommy Dreamer's music hits. Swagger says NO WAY his contract expires the day before the PPV. Tiffany says that's fine, because I signed him to a one day extension for the match - so either he wins or he leaves.

She closes with a smirk and tells Jack the match will be under EXTREME RULES. Swagger gets pissed and charges Dreamer while he does a Hogan style pose, and Dreamer dumps him to the floor. Just to show he's playing no favorites though he dumps Cage to the floor on the opposite side! Both men stare at him as Cage's music plays. Kozlov has a match NEXT so I suggest taking a long bathroom break right about now during and AFTER these commercial messages.

* Russell Taylor & Joey Ninos v. Vladimir Kozlov (2-on-1 Handicap Match)

I guess one jobber wasn't enough to get Kozlov over this week - they had to send out two. Naturally they found tow guys who together don't look like they weight as much as him. Kozlov finishes Ninos with the Iron Curtain for the three count. WINNER: KOZLOV. At least it was over quick. Backstage Dreamer and Cage get in an argument over what happened earlier, which leads to a brawl, which Finlay has to break up, which sends us to commercial.

"Don't Try This At Home" PSA when we come back from break. Mathews and Striker reinforce this on commentary as Mark Henry's music starts to play.

* Mark Henry v. Evan Bourne

Looking at this match reminds me of last night's Dream.9 where Minowa-Man faced Bob 'The Beast' Sapp. It may have the same outcome too with the smaller man beating the larger. Early in the match Henry is pounding Bourne into the ground and quite literally walking all over him. Bourne tries to start a comeback with kicks but gets blasted right in the face with a boot and covered for 1 until Bourne gets into the ropes. When Bourne falls out to the floor Tony Atlas takes advantage of him with a cheapshot. Bourne comes back in and Henry gives him a backbreaker. Striker: "This is almost becoming uncomfortable to watch." Sub in the word "boring" for "uncomfortable" Matt and you'd be right.

There's so little going on Striker discusses the fact the SHS on Henry's outfit means "Somebody Gon' Hurt Somebody." Nice idea but there's a G missing. Personally I always thought it meant Selzby High School. Henry misses a splash in the corner, Bourne knocks him down with kicks afterwards, Henry rolls out before the Shooting Star Press, Bourne jumps off the apron to wipe him out to the floor but gets caught, Bourne reverses being caught and shoots Henry into the steel of the corner, wipes him out on the floor, then leaps off his back to dive into the ring before the ref gets to ten!

WINNER VIA COUNTOUT: EVAN BOURNE. Henry screams "you're lucky to be alive" as Striker and Mathews say Finlay got an eye injury in the pull-apart so he will miss the six-man main event later. Commercial.

Backstage Tiffany tells Christian and Dreamer that since it's their fault Finlay got injured, they can go out and compete in a 2-on-3 handicap match without him.

Tyson Kidd, David Hart Smith and Natalya come down to the ring. She cuts a promo on their behalf explaining how they are all sons or daughters of the Hart family legacy and thus their name is the Hart Dynasty. Personally I still prefer the New Hart Foundation but it's a name I can live with. After the promo we go to commercial break. When we come back from break Swagger has already made his way down to the ring to join them.

* Tommy Dreamer & Christian Cage v. Hart Dynasty (w/ Natalya) & Jack Swagger

Cage and DH start the match. Eventually Swagger and Dreamer both tag in with Dreamer getting the better of it. He tags in Christian so they can hit a double team move and get the two count.

Dreamer and Christian cut off the ring and keep working Jack over. New Harts try to run in, babyfaces clear the ring, Christian wipes Swagger out on the floor and throws him back in for 2. Swagger finally counters Cage off the ropes to leave him laying and unable to tag Dreamer, sending us to commercial.

Key highlights when we come back from break are Christian hitting a reverse DDT, Dreamer hitting the Tree of Woe in the corner, but the DDT being blocked so that DH Smith can tag in to work Dreamer over.

Eventually Christian is sent into the steel post in the corner during the overrun, Swagger follows up with a gutwrench powerbomb for three, and then Dreamer eats a Hart Attack after the pinfall just to set up the Hart Dynasty and Swagger gloating when the show goes off the air. WINNERS: THE HEELS. That's it for ECW!

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