Tha Movie Review: Armored

This movie kicks ass. Plain and simple. If you want to see violence, suspense, and general ass kicking this I the movie for you. I wasn’t all that excited about seeing this movie at first. “Stealing money. Trouble starts. Fighting amongst the group. Been there. Seen that.” Oh, how wrong I was. I really need to stop going to movies based on trailers.

The movie starts off with a new guy played by Columbus Short joining the armored truck service. His dad worked at the same place once so all the guys treat him like family. They even stage a fake hold up to haze him in. It was rather fucked up but it showed how he would handle a stressful situation.

Things go downhill when one day Matt Dillon tells the new guy about a plan to steal $42 million from the next delivery. New guy doesn’t want to do it. He’s new. He’s a war hero. He just wants to make an honest living and take care of his younger brother. He caves in. He’s in debt. He’d be retarded to not take that much money. Right? I mean, in that situation who wouldn’t take it? You don’t know the guys he’s rolling with.

Laurence Fishburne is one of the veterans. And he is bat-shit crazy. He will not hesitate to fire his gun at someone and always has booze on him. I’ve never seen Fishburne this crazy since he played Ike Turner.

Skeet Ulrich is also in this film and I hadn’t seen his ass in a long time. Oh, and then there’s The Professional himself Jean Reno! Amaury Nolasco (crazy vet in Manchurian Candidate) rounds out this nutty ass group of would be thieves. This is not their first time to the dance I may add. They mention a previous heist they committed where they nabbed $4 million bucks in the 80’s. These guys aren’t rookies.

Things are going well for a while. They got the cash, the plan, and are on their way to being stinking ass rich. That is until a homeless man spots them. Fishburne does not hesitate to bust a cap in his ass. New guy tries and save him only for Dillon to blow his head off. Not the new guy, the homeless one. It is all downhill for the group after this.

A cop, played by Milo Ventimiglia (the crooked mouthed brother from "Heroes") hears an alarm set off by new guy after he locks himself in a truck. The guys spend the movie trying to get him out.

He brings the now shot and dying cop into the truck and tries to call for help. His younger brother gets brought in to make him turn himself over for an obvious execution. Dudes are dying left and right. Shit’s getting blown up. And you’ll never guess the ending.

Will the get the cash? Will new guy survive? And if he survives will he go to prison leaving his brother in the system? You go and find out. This movie is no Heat but its good.

Armored gets four “O”’s.

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