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Tha SmackDown! ThrowDown

Last night's "SmackDown!" featured several livestock in the ring, a hotel room scene involving strawberries, a midget throwing confetti on a teacher, and a deadman fighting a backwoods hick. That entire sentence should prove just how character and gimmick driven "SmackDown!" is, which may or may not be a bad thing.

The show started off with The Great Khali having another one of his parties in the ring. I must say, he sucks ass as a worker, but when he goes to have a shindig, he knows how to party.

The party, of course, was to give Big Show a "peace offering". To which Big Show came out and knocked Khali down with one punch. I'm questioning whether or not this feud will actually have a match, since according to the dirt sheets, Khali has to report back to India for a month or so because of obligations with the Punjab police department. Not that I would mind if no match happened, but I'd still kind of feel bad for Big Show. He's come back red-hot, and WWE would have dropped the ball again on him.

Will a number one contender for the tag team titles please stand up? Miz and Morrison have been squashing a lot of guys lately. I realize that your tag champs are supposed to look strong, but they have to have legit contenders once in a while too. Since they've been tag champs, it could be argued that only twice has anybody really challenged them for the titles. Not to mention, their matches the last two weeks have both been non-title. That's not good enough. Balls, E-you're breaking them.

Shawn Michaels and Batista had another promo last night. I think WWE is really stretching on just how many respectable promos Batista can cut. Backlash is still two weeks away, so if we're seeing two promos a week from these two, Batista may run out things to say. That aside, I have no complaints about this angle, it will help Batista get over as a heel (which he sorely needs), and as I've said before, this angle is being put together in a very compelling way.

So after a huge storyline that spanned all three shows, Finlay is now back solely on "SmackDown!", beating Matt Striker. What the hell? Does nobody realize that this guy is a great worker, is over, and can cut decent promos? What the hell more do you want in a main event guy?

While Finlay is still bound to the midcard, Vladimir Kozlov will probably lap him to the main event for some God-unknown reason. He won another squash match this week, against Matt Logan who we've seen multiple times in past years. Kozlov still hasn't done anything to overly impress me, but he also has yet to really put out a clusterfuck of a match. I'll have to see him perform against a guy who isn't a jobber before I actually make up my mind, I suppose.

Matt Hardy defeated Chuck Palumbo last night. Good to see that the most boring man on Friday nights has had his undeserved push brought to a halt. Moreover, it's been announced that MVP will face Matt Hardy at Backlash. Finally, we get the payoff of this feud! If that match is anything like the match they had last week, I'm popping like a ripe kernel right about now.

Poor Nattie Neidhart. The fact that they're openly showing that she has ties to the Hart family is an instant kiss of death. Last night, she came out as Victoria's valet, for lack of a better word. This is proof that there is nothing for her to do on "SmackDown!", I have no clue why WWE is putting divas on a show where there is no Women's Championship available. Either move all the divas to "Raw", or make the champion available to be on all three shows and face challengers from each.

Last night, Edge was shown in a hotel room with Vickie, engaging in some rather fetishistic acitivities. With the E's upcoming push to make programming more kid-friendly, I wonder what will happen with Edge. Obviously, he can't be heavily marketed as the "Rated R Superstar" if WWE programming is meant to be rated G. But, he's also a main eventer and is way too valuable to just shove on the sidelines for several months while you figure out how to repackage him. This is an interesting dilemma.

Is Jesse injured and I didn't hear anything about it? Festus has been working an awful lot of singles matches lately, and that's the only good reason I can think of for them happening. Jesse and Festus are a very over tag team, so it's way too early to split them up and focus on Festus as a singles star. Maybe a ways down the road, but for the moment, this duo can do a lot for your tag team division.

That being said, I enjoyed Festus' match last night with Undertaker. I loved how Michael Cole kept putting over the fact that Festus, who is usually out to lunch, didn't realize that he was going up against Undertaker. I loved it because that's what happened. The commentary of Michael Cole last night really helped to add to the psychology of the match, and he should be commended on it, especially when he has dead weight sitting next to him at that commentary table.

Tha results:
*The Miz & John Morrison def. Jimmy Wang Yang & Shannon Moore
*Finlay def. Matt Striker
*Victoria def. Michelle McCool
*Vladimir Kozlov def. Matt Logan
*Matt Hardy def. Chuck Palumbo
*Undertaker def. Festus

3 comments: on "Tha SmackDown! ThrowDown"

D.J.B. said...

Vinny Mac has a hard on for big dudes. Even though I liked Festus' match, it didn't make too much sense.

As far as number one contenders to the tag team titles I think, that while the E is trying to make us think about the tag teams more now, they aren't. They have guys to face the champs on the weekly shows, but at the PPV's we get nothing. Expect no title changes in the tag team ranks until June at Night of Champions.

MVP/Matt Hardy was/is/will be a great feud. Contrary to one of Dan's greatest songs, It's NOT over. If there does happen to be a title change at Backlash you're forgetting the rematch. I think they can drag two or three more matches out of this one.

House said...

I'm O'ing for MVP on commentary telling Coach to shut his mouth and shooting on how he replaced JBL and brought the commentating team to the shitter.

Now if only somebody could do the same thing to Don West I'd be a happy man.

Anonymous said...

Finlay will sadly never been a main eventer, due to the fact he's a foreigner and that's a big no-no in WWE, America only to be #1, the racist fucks! Nattie is screwed there, she's a Hart so that means she's going nowhere! :(