Friday Night Fallout: It's Good To Be King

What up O-sters? Matt Hardy VS. The Masterpiece...did MVP get involved? Did Finlay really take on...Jimmy Wang Yang? Was that another Jesse and Festus vignette? Who was that mystery woman that got speared by the Edgester?

All that and much more, so strap in, sit tight and hold on to your hats and bandanas, cause this is "Friday Night Fallout"!

Another match to add to "SmackDown!"'s decent to very good opening matches sees Matt Hardy lay claim to yet another victory as he devalues The Masterpiece with the oh so deadly Twist of Fate. Not too much great action went on in this match, but enough to keep the attention of the crowd and the viewers.

I was struck with a thought - yeah I know scary - but seriously, is the Matt Hardy VS. MVP feud/match being built a little better than the Kane VS. Edge feud? I believe so, and it's not that I'm a Hardy mark, it's that this match/feud has a little more substance. MVP did the guest commentating spot, which is always entertaining, unless Batista or Khali decide to do it before their match on next week's show.

Anyway, MVP got himself over at the table and Hardy got himself over by going over, and then he got the good ol' babyface beatdown. I mean lets face it, MVP VS. Matt Hardy could in all actuality be a better match than Edge VS. Kane...AGAIN! It can also lead to a bigger, longer feud for the two future World Champions. It's also a feud that hasn't been done before.

Cruel irony note: Three of the four aforementioned men were involved on or off screen with Lita. I'm guessing MVP didn't jump in at the last minute.

I personally don't get how Jimmy Wang Yang went from Cruiserweight top contender to job meat for midcarder/lower main eventers. It does boggle the mind. Anyway, it was a good match, though quite anti-climatic with Finlay going over with the Celtic Cross - which by the way is a dope move. The highlight of this match, however, was my boy Hornswoggle. Always an entertainer. Why not move him to "Raw" and give him a run with the IC strap?

Okay, another thing I don't get: Chavo and Noble jobbing to the "on fire" Vanilla Brothers. I personally like Noble/Chavo as a team, I just don't think it does anything for either team to have them go down to the Major Bros. We all know that when Jesse and the ladies man Festus get the call to show up, they'll go over on everybody, or as they would say, "Run through all them big time rasslin' teams like a pot'a'beans through grandpappy".

So The Great Khali can intimidate people. Woohoo! Poor Vickie, where is this going? Will she and Krystal turn on Teddy and take his life savings or some lame gimmick like that? Also, does Khali's translator annoy anyone else? By the way Sasquatch, they don't make chairs your size.

I dig the whole Kane/Taker appearances when people are turned around, really I do, but tonight they would have been cooler had they not been done in the previous feud between the two. I know that this is totally different because their is no Lita, and there is a World Title, but if this is going to be a major feud, shouldn't it have waited a little longer? I know Donnie doesn't like Triple H: Coming Soon, so how do you like Rey Mysterio...?

Batista and Khali, yadda yadda yadda. They throw stuff, therefore I guess the divorce is coming. While the match was no doubt going to be lackluster, I thought maybe the build could have grabbed some interest, alas, it has not and will not, considering they have a two hour timeslot in which to do so.

Guess what? Chuck Palumbo is going to be a champion. Do you know why? He went out for drinks with JBL. Matt Striker caught shit for not doing it, and Chuck Palumbo was put over like nobody's business on TV for doing it. He won a short match over Mo Hawk, but I do think the motorcycle gimmick could get him much more over than the FBI did, and even garner a U.S. run on it's own, but with JBL behind him, who knows.

So now, I can run through almost the entire rest of the show in one paragraph. Eugene likes Deuce & Domino's car, still not Cherry's melons, he replaced one of the D's and got to ride in the car and was subsequently squashed by Fat Albert and taunted by the boys D.

Michelle McCool is awesome, and she loves life. Vickie is Krystal's maid of honor. Torrie and Victoria still don't get along, and Torrie beat her by countout. All that took up TV time folks, and except for Michelle McCool, I do not know why. Do you also realize Torrie VS. Victoria was the main event?

Honestly, I should have and normally would have O'ed for their segment, but sadly, I cannot be interested in this Edge VS. Kane match. It was funny and entertaining, although I thought we should have seen some titaz before beads were flung. Truss - no tits, no beads.

The guy in the front row Edge called Reggie Bush did however elicit an O from yours truly. The spear to the abnormally large queen was basically a, "Hey Kane is the Burger King dude." So yes, Kane takes out Edge until his paid paraders jump in, wait what? I just didn't get it.

Well, that's it for this week, and sadly it may have been the worst "SmackDown!" I've seen in a long while. My sad, selfish cry out to the writers is this, "Please, don't let "SmackDown!" go back to being the laughing stock of wrestling, PLEASE!" Well, I'm out and until next time, Oooooooooooooooooooooo!

Quick results in case you missed it:
Matt Hardy def. Chris Masters
Finlay def. Jimmy Wang Yang
The Major Brothers def. Cruiserweight Champion Chavo Guerrero and Jamie Noble
Chuck Palumbo def. Mo Hawk (or Luke Hawks as he was referred to)
Mark Henry def. Eugene
Torrie Wilson def. Victoria via countout (honest to God, it was the final match of
the card!)

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