I joined this site back in September and quickly became a frequent O-ster, often times posting multiple comments in the same article. Ever since I joined, I always used a name, either the kayfabed "The Hitman" or eventually, my real name, Brian Plunkett. Since joining, I have tried my best to be tactful, and to try not to heatseek, but rather, to try and calmly explain my views on articles.That ends now. You anonymous people are starting to piss me off!
Now, I realize that there are a few people that leave anonymous comments that actually have something intelligent and insightful to say. However, most of them either now use a kayfabe name, or are a registered user.
Now, it seems like everytime someone posts an article where they criticize the way WWE or TNA does its booking these days, we get accused of being self-righteous smarks who are acting like we know more about this business than we do. These braindead marks will talk about how Cena and Batista wouldn't be in their positions if they weren't entertaining.
Newsflash - they're not! They're in the position they're in because McMahon decided to put them there. It doesn't mean they're good, and it certainly doesn't mean they deserve it.
Smarks are just as concerned with being entertained by what we watch. But we want to be entertained by guys who are ACTUALLY entertaining, not by guys who the people backstage tell us are entertaining.
So we pick on people when it helps our case? Gee, I'm pretty sure that anyone will do that if they're arguing. I'm sure that if any of you anonymous idiots have ever been in a debate, you've portrayed something as being in a negative light. The fact that it's someone that you marks cheer for doesn't mean that we're doing anything cruel; it's simply a matter of opinion, so get over it.
Are all smarks excellent bookers? No, but we certainly have a general idea as to what would create a naturally entertaining product instead of shoving gassed-up idiots like Batista down fans' throats. For instance, Ken Kennedy feuding with Edge; one face, one heel. Both can cut great promos, and both are naturally charismatic. There's a smark-friendly program.Now compare that to Bibby Lindsay, who doesn't know how to cut promos by any means, or guys like John Cena, who relies on zingers like the now-classic "poopy pants". Which is more entertaining? In that context, clearly Kennedy/Edge. But WWE tries to cover it up and package their feuds so that marks don't realize this. Consequently, idiots like you anonymous people think that Cena is the greatest guy ever. You can't force charisma, plain and simple.
I'm probably the least knowledgable out of any of the writers for this site, and even I have been able to come up with a few good ideas now and then. With that in mind, there are 13 other guys at this site who would know how to successfully create entertaining storylines and feuds.
Now, for those of you who want to play the "Well, you've never worked for WWE" card, Big Daddy Donnie has successfully booked for wrestling promotions before, and has had some of his fantasy bookings ripped off by WWE before, so obviously, smarks must know something about the business.
For all of you anonymous people, I'm not telling you to go away, but for the love of God, stop trying to put yourselves and losers like Cena and Batista over while criticizing the people who run Tha O Show. We are just as knowledgable as we "fancy" being. Pardon me while I go sip some tea and eat some crumpets.
And one last thing, for those anonymous idiots who want to criticize smarks and say that we're trying to suck the fun out of wrestling - how is your wrestling website doing? Your John Cena fansite getting a lot of clicks? How about that Batista forum that gets loaded up with posts that "OmGz BaTiStA ToTaLlY RoXxOrS mE!"? That getting a whole lot of intelligent debate going on?Obviously, people must like something about Tha O Show if it's growing so fast and schmucks like me take so much pride in being a writer for the site. Everybody gets to voice their opinion on this site, but if you want to bash all the smarks on this site in the gay manner you have been, then you can look forward to more articles like these in the future.
17 comments: on "Serious Heatseeking"
After a long hiatus I come back to see this?
Did I die and Brian Pillman cut a promo in Heaven?
Seriously though, it's a great read.
But I will go out on a limb and say this about Batista and Cena....
I liked them better in OVW as Leviathan and The Prototype respectively.
Oh yes....i'm back and i'm full of piss & vinegar.
RoXxOrS.....LLMAO ok ive been to a lot of different forums i can honestly say ive have never ever seen that..but i agree wit you stop posting as anonymous....i think batista and cena..but i have the stupid humor so poopy pants most likely mademe laugh...meh...never said i was smart.....did i make my point? i cant remember..LMAO!!
I, personally, see and understand your position but i have to say that if one takes your personal views out of what your arguing, your domain assumptions doesnt stand to well. You seem to have some good reasoning on what to expect from promotions. Exciting promos and solid matches are things that marks and "smarks" (though i use that term lightly, I think we are all marks in certain ways)both should expect and for the most part do.
However, i do think the logic ends there. Its fine to be critical of the WWE, or TNA, or Vince Mcmahon. Everyone has their opinions.I have my creative disargeement with all 3 from time to time. But i try to to understand the grander schemes of the decisions they make. Even after that I might decide that they made a bad move but at least I took the time to attempt to fully understand the situation. And besides they makes several decisions a day and they are bound to make mistakes or bad decisions. But people tend rob themselves of intellectual legitamacy when they make statements like "mcmahons on some power trip who loves stroking his ego by torturing a small select group of his fan base by deliberately shoving horrible people down their throats".
By putting your own personal biases aside, one can see that thats not likely the case. Sure you can adhere to net dirtsheets to back up such rhetoric but i hope you dont base all your life's domain assumptions on unmidigated rumors. You also seem to have this really rigid idea of what "an intelligent wrestling fan" is. This ultimately means hating john cena and batista...and to a lesser extent lashley and umaga from what im getting. Personally, I think smart fans can like cena, or batista or anyone else. Honestly, theres alot of potential in these people despite their flaws.
What I think makes an intelligent discussion of wrestling is to explore reasonings of creative decisions of people like mcmahon (and not just things about his ego and how he hates you)and where his decisions may go. You can be critical and intelligent without a message of "stupid people are being pushed cause vince mcmahons stupid and anyone who likes it is stupid"
The truth hurts.
mr. omega,
I see where you're coming from, but I think you may have missed part of my point.
Snoop around the site-I actually have come to Cena, Batista, and Lashley's side on certain occasions. Smarks certainly can like them, if they're used properly in a manner that allows them to be naturally charismatic and consequently entertaining. Right now, they aren't. They're being portrayed like characters in a child's cartoon.
If you were to look at Dan-e-o's article from yesterday, Gordo AKA Chase made one very good point. Right now, there isn't much of an alternative to WWE. TNA is the closest thing, but their product right now isn't that good, so for most fans who live in areas with few or no indy shows, it's WWE or nothing.
McMahon knows this, and has no reason to go out of his way to please the fans. He does what he wants. When everybody else backstage wanted to end D-X after Unforgiven, Vince and Stephanie wanted to keep it going. We all know what happened in the end.
Basic business logic dictates that when you have no real competition, and you have a stranglehold on the business (Speaking of Stranglehold, for people in the Greater Toronto area, don't forget to get your tickets for Devil's Playground, April 8th), there's not a whole lot you can't get away with. So McMahon makes what he tells people are exciting promos and hot matches, even though they're not. But who has the authority stand up to him and tell him otherwise, and have him actually listen?
Everyone's a mark one way or the other. What makes you a "smark" is that you go beyond wins and losses and actually pay attention to who can work and who can't. No different than any other sport out there.
Why is being a bit knowledgeable so bad. You go out to eat, you don't like it, you critique it. Same here. We watch it, we critique it.
The current champions are all bland and stale.
Batista hasn't been the same ever since he came back. Maybe he feels he's already at the top and doesn't need to keep giving it all. Go back and watch his matches pre injury and watch one post injury. I'm pretty sure you'll see a difference.
Cena's character (which everone they make him show up with that week) is so old and boring. I don't give him shit for calling people poopy pants cause no one gives the Rock shit for calling Umaga a monkey penis. But I do give him shit for not making his character better.
Lashley was just pushed way to fast. He can't talk worth shit but he can wrestle a bit. If they push him right(big challenge there huh E) he could be the force they want him to be. He's actually been growing on me the last few weeks.(maybe cause he's raking up the points for me).
It's been said a hundred times before, at least kayfabe a name when you post people. If not, you're gonna get shit from some including me probably.
I keep coming back to comparing The Rock to John Cena. They have a lot of things in common: a weak flashy move (The People's Elbow and Five-Knuckle Shuffle), silly gestures (the eyebrow and the salute), and flinging playground-level insults. Do you tolerate these little things from The Rock because he can put together a decent match and sell well for another? Was his rise to the top better paced, making him more deserving of his status? Does charisma really go a long way? Frankly, I didn't care when he showed up on that pre-taped spot to plug the McMahon/Trump match, and rolled my eyes at the "shriveled up monkey penis" that seemed to have everyone else in stitches. So I ask, not as a challenge but a conversation, what qualities, tangible or intangible, does The Rock possess that John Cena is missing?
You mentioned all in your own response. Better paced rise, although he too was pushed hard at the beginning. He's got tons more charisma than Cena. He's had great matches and he could sell like no one else. Just check him taking a stunner you'll see what I mean. I think the problem is that he was the first, so to speak, and Cena just comes off as a weak ripoff.
There's one other thing that metal missed.
Cena used to be a smark favorite. The dude made people pop by battle-rapping a cardboard cutout. Even though he was a heel, he was wildly popular because his edgy humor was truly entertaining.
The FCC told him to lose his edge, so now, unless WWE completely gives his gimmick an overhaul, he has to rely on childish humor to still come off as a guy whose humor is supposed to be edgy. And it just isn't working.
That is the biggest intangible-The Rock was allowed to go out and have crude humor that would appeal to adolescents. Cena is not. In-ring skills aside, that's what makes the difference.
During the Rock's meteoric rise, he was often criticized for over-selling. This was most apparant when being rammed into the turnbuckle or taking a move like the stunner.
WWE decided the Rock was a star when he first came into the promotion. Lucky for him they didn't have a bunch of Rocky Miavia t-shirts that were selling like hotcakes (how well do hotcakes sell by the way?).
John Cena's gift and curse is how over he is with marks. If he wasn't, he likely wouldn't be World Champion right now. Then again, if he wasn't, he would likely be built into a better character that smarks could appreciate more.
This is essentially what happened with the Rock. Placed with the Nation of Domination and given a chance to grow, he reached a great deal of popularity, but rather than pull the trigger, the WWE turned him heel again and put him with the corporation.
By the time the Rock was given to us as a full fledged top tier babyface, we had been asking for it for at least a year. To be honest, as a huge Rock fan from the Nation days when he first showed his personality, I lost some interest when he finally became a fan favorite.
Don't get me wrong, he was still having memorable matches and cutting great promos, but there is something less satisfying about being one of the millions and millions of Rock's fan comparitavely to being the only dude cheering for the people's elbow when he's teaming in a 6 man tag with D-Lo Brown and Farooq.
I digress. Eventually, the fans turned the Rock back into a heel, after tiring out on his babyface character. That didn't last either, because as a heel, the Rock reminded us all why we liked him in the first place.
I think if Cena could get that heel turn, more people would remember that as well, but right now, he is selling too many t's.
WWE intially wanted The Rock to be the one who hit Austin with the car, but wound up giving that distinction to Rikishi for the same reason. Merchandise has a lot to do with WWE's bottom line.
Another big difference between Cena and the Rock is the fact that when The Rock came out, he was new, fresh, and different. I am 23 now, but I was in my teens when the Rock was rambling on with charismatic phrases like candy-ass.
I think that eventually with monkey-turds and strudel, he became a parody of himself. No longer really funny, but just trying way too hard to come up with the next buzz word that will make us laugh. It was like watching an episode of All That on Nickelodeon. I don't know if that's because I was maturing or because the Rock lost a step.
Either way, at the beginning of his run, The Rock was the originator. Since then, they have tried to put Orton, Cena, and Carlito into The Rock's place.
Simply put, no one can fill that spot. No one can get into The Rock's shoes. Every breakthrough babyface is having to deal with the pressure of being the next Rock, and they are booked to act like it and scripted to talk like it.
This is why John Cena is saying poopy pants and only 5th grade boys are laughing. It comes off as being forced because that's not John Cena. Cena was edgy as a rapper, and his topics were controversial but more adult.
Cena as a babyface has no edge. Without that edge, and because of his limited in ring ability, a lot of people have turned on him. I haven't because I blame it more on creative's desire to build the next megastar in an old mold.
Even when The Rock hosted SNL, that seemed like a natural transition. WWE is trying to get Cena that mainstream crossover, but it comes off as being forced.
John Cena has the charisma and ability where WWE could lay back and go with the flow. I think he could deliver the next line that would be equivalent in popularity to "Austin 3:16" if they'd take the cuffs off him and just let him do his thing.
With the Rock, they were pushing a talent. In John Cena's case they are pushing a concept rather than a talent.
John Cena will never be the Rock, and the longer WWE expects him to be, the more fans he is going to lose.
Damn straight, Haught. We've all been begging for a Cena heel turn for quite some time now, because he needs one for the reason you mentioned. Every smark knows that Cena can be entertaining, but the way they're packaging him is NOT the way that unlocks his charisma.
By the way, McDonald's hotcakes never really sold well except for when the store owner put them on special for 99 cents every Sunday.
Damn, Haught, I think you just nailed it. I think too often that we, myself included, forget just how much of an on-screen character is molded by strictly business factors. It's not just blind "mark" reactions that put guys like Cena and Batista on top - marks will always react how they're supposed to - but these guys have connected with them enough to make them want to buy t-shirts and other merch. As long as house numbers are good and the ratings stay up, why change? WWE is in a transition period again where they're trying to bring their fanbase back up and when you're trying to do that, you have to stick with the proven money guys and the smarks just have to accept it as part of the wrestling life cycle.
Now this is the intelligent wrestling debating that makes me an O Show fan.
Screw it, I usually dont do this I'll heatseek. But first, Plunkett and Haught, both of you had excellent points, and talked about this intelligently yet used terminology maybe even our annymus friends can understand.
But, John Cena is Vince's pet project, or just plain pet. So I dont know who is playing who, if Cena thinks this is entertaining, but probably not, because he WAS awesome even when he first won the WWE championship some 2 years ago. He maintained his edge during his transition to RAW, but it was somewhere in his title run and fued with Kurt Angle(who sadly had to put Cena over again, and again, and again.) that he became stale, stopped selling completely, and stopped doing freestyles altogether. The last one he did I honestly popped for when K-Fed debuted. But the way his character is now even that freestyle seemed forced. Likely though, Vince Mcmahon does think that Cena is the next Rock, because Cena's merch sales are big, BUT they were much bigger when it was the jersey's, hates, chains, necklaces, and cool t-shirt. I think his last HUGE seller was the HUSTLE.LOYALTY.RESPECT T-shirt. He has others that sell, but when the E and FCC made him shy away from the image that made him what he is, he lost steam his merch lost steam, and sadly the product lost a bit of steam. All in all I don't despise Cena, I despise this current rapparine character he's stuck in. I'm not big on wrestling in jeans and tennis shoes myself unless its a street fight, but thats just my opinion. Although he supposedly owns like 80+pair of tights and boots, yet he wears jean shorts and tennis shoes EVERY TIME HE WRESTLES. By the way where are the pumps?
I've said it before I'll say it again, Bibby could go to Bobby in 1 week. Give him a manager, because his talent is there, and if tweaked and given a little more training dude would be the next...better Lesnar.
Again, I've said it before and I'll say it again. Batista is pure garbage in and out of the ring. This is my heatseeking. He IS HHH's pet, it's clear, and it should be well known. Dirt sheet or no dirt sheet, had H not seen molding Batista as part of his "legacy" we wouldn't have to worry about Mr. Steroid '04, '05, '06, and '07. By the way how was his name not mentioned in that steroid scandal. Unless his came 100% illegally no prescription or anything. Back to it, I've caught heet before for comparing him to Warrior, but I'll do it again. I think it's somewhat obvious. He shows no passion, and hasn't ever really shown a passion, just stiffness. Fallen0ne we don't always agree, and I'm not being a smartass which injury are you referring to? The tricpes tear where he had to drop the belt right? You're right before that he actually put together decent matches if being carried by wrestlers good enough to. Batista on his own with an unproven, inable talent would flounder quicker than Gillberg. He has a unique look, lots of steroids, and a friend in a high place who keep him where he is. I will never ever blame Vince 100% for him, I blame H, Dusty, and Michael P.S Hayes. They have pushed for this dude to be the top guy and Vince caved. Call it dirtsheet rumors, bs or whatever you want, but if you can look at Batista in ring now and say he's passionate about what he does you need to look in the dictionary and find the definition of passion.
I'm not disappointed with the E as a whole, I'm disappointed in 1 of its champions altogether, 1 in terms of character, and 1 in terms of then not knowing how to package him. I probably couldn't book an excellent show everyweek, but I sure think I could book one better than last Mondays RAW, especially with all 3 brands at your disposal on the way to MANIA.
I wrote this article in a heatseeking attempt to call out and basically verbally bitchslap those anonymous punks, and instead it sparked this huge debate where everybody has had something insightful to say. Those anonymous dudes seem to have backed the fuck down. Kickass.
prolly a little late but cena WAS entertaining when he was a heel on smackdown his freestyle rapping was entertaining the one on lesnar was funny as fuck
Maybe there should be like a permanent thing on the site that shows the retard bastards to just click the little other button, and then type whatever beside the word NAME.
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