As O-sters are well aware, I sometimes use the "O" and "NO" analogy to pick apart a wrestling program or event of my choosing. Last night's "Raw" left me no ability to do so this time around. It was completely O-less.Does an article about last night's "Raw" even need to be written? Is there anyone out there who enjoyed it?
I don't know what was worse - John Cena VS. The Great Khali or Donald Trump VS. Rosie O'Donell!
Okay, okay...seriously - not even I can diss Cena that hard. The fake Trump/O'Donell fiasco was nothing short of embarrassing. A true sore spot in the history of "Raw" - which ironically WWE showcased last night as this week marks the 14th anniversary of the Monday night phenomenon.
I must admit that I found Vince's reference to Rosie in all her "lesbionic fury" was kinda funny. I even enjoyed her entrance music. But that's when the fun stopped. I can't believe that Vince actually had these jokers perform a match.When will Vince get it? What chant is going to convince him that WWE fans don't wanna see this crap? Speaking of which, what chant did you like best during this horrific debacle? They were as follows in chronological order: "BORING", "VKM" and "We Want Wrestling!".
Quite frankly, they were all very appropriate. I gotta say though, the simple acknowledgment of a TNA gimmick from the WWE crowd was a really interesting occurance. And well deserved considering what we were watching. The poor Kansas City wrestling fans got ripped off last night...hard!
As well, I'll hand it to those who claim the 'fluke' Cena win at New Year's Resolution only helps prolong the feud between the champ and Umaga. That it does - but the finish at the pay-per-view still sucked big time. And quite honestly, I'm longing for the days when the WWE Championship program does not involve John Cena.
The Rated RKO segment was probably the highlight of the night. And that's not saying much considering that they weren't even wrestling.The angle that Orton and Edge are involved in with DX took an interesting turn last night. Triple H's legitimate knee injury adds fuel to an already heated feud.
Not that I wanted anyone to be seriously hurt - who ever does? - but I love it when real life is played into storylines (with the obvious exception of spoofing the real life feud between Donald Trump and Rosie O'Donell. Sorry I just can't get over it, it was so stupid. Just how did she manage to get THREE O's in her name anyway?). I'm probably more curious now than ever to see what happens between DX and Rated RKO.
If one of our new O-sters wasn't pulling our leg, Sean Waltman a.k.a. X-Pac may be rejoining his old crew. Don't know how much I'd pop for that though. However, if he shows up with Chyna, I'll shit myself. (Thank God we all know that ain't happenin'!).
I guess the bright side to last night's "Raw" is that it can't get much worse. Can it? Here's hoping they got their shit show of 2007 out of the way early.
15 comments: on ""Raw" - Tha "NO" Show"
smackdown anybody anybody well ill probally be switching ovet to friday on my dvr and booing everything batista does im huge cena fan and even im sick of him turn him heel please and for an after thought why would you have Chris master win in classic heel form gain maseive crowd heat just to have loose from silly outside interference wich one these guys is heel and face im confussed
Does The Great Khali remind anyone else of Giant Silva? He was a dud, too.
What a crap show! Rosie and Donald get ten minutes of in ring time!?!? I don't know what's worse though, The fact they got the ten minutes or the fact that they displayed more wrestling then the "main event" did.
Is someone blackmailing Vince to put out crap??? Does anyone care about Khali?
At least it looks like DX is gonna add another member. Interesting to see who they'll pick.
Hey double double E, get the tag straps on Cade & Murdoch asap, cause those guys rock.
Okay, I just have to say it. First of all what burns my ass is seeing John "the Marine" Cena parading around like he is a real soldier and saluting the fans. Just because he was in one day of Marine boot camp training and did a movie??? C'mon, enough is enough! Then, they have a fake Rosie and Donald appear on live tv for a match. Didn't they try that fake imposter celeb shit a few weeks ago? They had President Bush Jr. appear with Cryme Tyme and they were booed badly. Who comes up with this crap? When will the WWE ever learn? And the last thing, I heard good old JR say last night that The "Great" Khali's contract(and I use the term "Great" very loosely here), has expired in ECW and that he has been picked up by Jonathan Coachman. WTF??? Wasn't he in ECW for something like a total of 3 months??? Wow, that's one hell of a short contract isn't it? I thought that they were trying to better RAW and not make it any worse than it is right now. And what the hell did he say on the mic? Terrible!
The problem with Khali on the mic is they already have one guy who's gimmick is too be completely impossible to understand. That's the man who LOVES Double Double E! Vladmir (don't call him Victor) Kozlov.
I find it very hard to believe that the Marines would truly look up to a guy like Cena. My dad was a Marine in Vietnam, and he has said several times while watching WWE that he thinks Cena is just a punk. I think the Marines that somehow end up at RAW on a very regular basis are bribed into it. You know, "Hey, here are free ringside tickets, just pretend to cheer for Cena when he comes out and we point the cameras at you." I'm not entirely sure how realisitc of farfetched that idea is, but it's always possible.
how realistic or* farfetched.
The feud between my computer and I rages on.
Hell Orton was a marine, and went AWOL getting a "less than honorable discharge," and I'd much rather see him doing this gimmick. Inside the ring, John Cena aint shit. Bring back the heel Cena who did the freestyles, involved a dick-joke, and threw peanuts. Anyone notice that he doesn't pump up the reeboks anymore, and if I noticed correctly, at NYR he looked like he was wearing skater shoes. Nothing against skater shoes, but do they really go with Chaingang, Mitchell and Ness jean shorts and Chaingang boxers? Not to mention a spinning title belt? I believe he's a very confused man, either he or Vince has lost their shit completely.
I'd love to find a mark that thinks Cena is a marine though. That'd be the shit. One almost has to be mindless to enjoy, or like Cena at this point.
Thank God for TiVo! The celeb look alikes went WAY too long, if they had kept the entire thing down to like seven minutes (everything) it would have been mildly amusing. I detest the mumbling Khali, really, I can't think of a wrestler in the past ten years that I dislike more. The only interesting points last night were the Rated RKO spot and me hoping they'll convince Jericho to team with HBK (lots of possibilities, no probability). I missed the PPV and it looks like Johnny Nitro and Jeff Hardy had a great match, the finisher was nice (although I still don't understand why theres a door). I'm a big time Nitro mark! The Cena underdog routine is past it's expiration date, why can't they give him matches with people who can wrestle? At least then it'd be half a decent match... And what does it say when a guy with poor english saying Double Double E has better mike skills than half the locker room?
Hmmm...a silver lining is perhaps Armando Estrada acquiring Khali and starting a monster heel stable(with Umaga) circa the Heenan family? Sounds more like it would be Luna Vachon and the Oddities! If Khali or Umaga start dancing in the ring with a stuffed Cartman, I quit watching wrestling on Monday nights for good!!!
"If Khali or Umaga start dancing in the ring with a stuffed Cartman . . . "
Ah, I miss John Tenta. RIP
THE ODDITIES? thats around the time i started boycotting WWEfor 2-3 years... and though i havent watched RAW the past two weeks due to a slow moving cable provider... i refuse to watch it if this is what they consider entertainment... Kfed? i dont care what the sheets say about his behavior backstage, its rediculous... and Trump is boring... and only hot women should be allowed on RAW, hell all of TV in general...
Luckily i still get the WB, so i get to watch WWE's only worthwhile program, SD
They should have had Vince say "Rob Conway, you are not fired, you are traded... to ECW! With Snitsky (or someone) and 2 of Raws 10 Royal Rumble spots (or some bullshit like that) for CM Punk (he is being underused over there, great for IC title) and The GREAT KHALI!"
I would say Punks name last tho...
I'm still trying to figure out the "Great" in the name of Khali. I know it isn't great in ability, or even great in physique, or physical shape in general...I guess it's because he is great-ly overrated, or great in stature. Other than that I'm out, nothing else for me to say.
Khali makes Kurrgan look like Bruno Sammartino
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